As today’s journey begins I find myself more anxious than normal.  I’ve now surrendered it knowing my role is to be Christ’s servant, following His Spirit’s lead and to let His Light so shine.  I think it is somewhat like being a torchbearer.

Today, one of my grandsons is having surgery removing his tonsils.  Not a big deal but he and his mom are in turmoil.  They need prayer.  I meet today with a young man who wants to talk to me about his past which he says is similar to mine. He wants a book and to talk.  Late this afternoon is the funeral service for my grand nephew who drowned a little over a week ago.  Tonight is the weekly step study where everyone is now addressing their inventory.  On top of this, Kathy and I had friends arrive last night who will be with us throughout this week.  They are here to see many friends so the fact that this day keeps me away from them is no problem in that they will be out and about.  I just know that in my old self I would be anxious and preparing all kinds of “mini-speeches” in my mind for each of these events of the day.  However, God made it very clear this morning that He simply wants the Light of His Spirit to be what is seen today.  The darkness of our soul is not penetrated by our human words, but entirely by the message He inspires at the time He is working.  The Holy Spirit’s work is always about reaching into the darkness of each one’s soul.  It is in this arena that I want to be fully awake and surrendered as I personally walk into each of the day’s events.

It is a sad thing to me knowing that it is only in struggle that we reach out to Jesus fully.  How I’ve prayed in previous years for this to not be the case for my kids and grandkids and for others precious to me, but as life unfolds, the truth of living each day reveals that struggle is the light switch.  It is from the struggle we see our need to find the Light of Jesus.  I want to keep this foremost in my living of today.