Today’s journey has an abundance of activity in it.  It starts very typically with choir, church service, and then a step study for Celebrate Recovery.  After church there is a CR leadership monthly meeting and then I’m either to practice with our quartet for 2 upcoming events or meet with one of the CR men.  At 6:00 I give my testimony at a church in Nampa.  The interesting thing about this is today’s step study lesson is ACTION.  This is the new step study for those who have been in leadership for a while.  It asks questions about the “whys” we are doing what we are doing?  Are we trying to be in control or allowing ourselves to be fully committed to God’s leadership and how do we know the difference?  Well, I am in the midst of trying to work through all of these questions in my daily living.  I do know I am learning the difference between responding to my will vs The Holy Spirit.  When the Holy Spirit is in control I am not, I am obedient and leaving control out of my hands.  This is a tough item for me in many circumstances but little by little I am making progress.

I find it fascinating that most of my life I did lots of the same activities I do today.  The difference is that I did them to keep people from seeing my past.  Now I do them so people can know my past and hopefully see that they don’t need to keep secrets either.  I never knew in those earlier days how selfish my actions were–trying to keep others’ eyes on activity and not me. Man is sure a selfish being and I am right in the midst of my own learning about this. This is a huge item of freedom that requires a lot of humility to see the truth of it.  I want to stay here the rest of my life.  To God be the Glory!