Yesterday my biggest fear turned into reality.  The board member I respected the most with Aslan resigned.  She felt she was the hindrance to others being able to move forward with the work. My logical mind can see this but my emotional side screams.  She was the reason I joined the board in the first place and she’s the one I wanted to work on this topic of sex trafficked girls with.  As I type this I already see the flaw.  My motivation was about man and me.  Every since I received the email yesterday late afternoon I’ve been hurting.  I don’t enjoy working with the other board members.  It seems I spend more time trying to show them a better route to take and battling their feelings.  All this is about man and me.  This morning God has taken the entire devotional time to show me HIM.  He has wanted me to have my eyes on Him and not on man.  Little did I realize how much my eyes were on man until the “man” I enjoyed and appreciated was removed from the picture.

As I started to pray using my prayer list, I saw what I see each morning, my written instructions for praising God and thanking Him for making me a new creation.  As soon as I saw this I was reminded that a new creation may be sad to see a member leave, but knows that God is Mightily in control of His Kingdom Work.  I really needed this reminder.  It also reminded me to tell God I was sorry for my momentary desire to fight back under my own strength and frustration.  I have a major trip I’m taking with the founder of Aslan next week to see a program we may model ours after which is in Denver.  God is reminding me to stay with Him in this.  If I am to ever receive the double blessing He showed me several days ago as with Elisha who stayed with Elijah, I must “wait on Him” and “stay with Him” while I wait.

Being a new creation isn’t the peace of a tranquil lake with no storm present, but it is the peace of the bird and nest in the tree by the raging falls.  My peace comes from looking up, not from looking at the falls.