Last Sunday I missed the step study lesson our group did.  It is called Turn and it focuses on turning your will over to the control of God.  Today’s lesson is Action.  It is focused on taking action on what God has for you to do.  These are simple definitions and for the most part I’ve live it as such for the past 9 years in my life application of the lessons.

This morning as I was going through them in preparation for today I had a real awakening.  God has been working with me a great deal in helping me build intimacy with Him.  In the lesson on Turn we are to turn our will over to our Higher Power–Jesus Christ.  I’ve known this and it meant just that.  Today as I read this I was struck with the truth of my belief.  Jesus Christ’s power was getting me to heaven when I die.  His death and resurrection paved the way for this.  God, this morning, wanted me to see the truth of Christ’s Power in my day to day living.  The truth to this power is enabled by His Gift to us when we accept Him as our Savior and Lord.  This Gift is The Holy Spirit.

The Holy Spirit is within me and He communes with my spirit.  However, if my spirit is not fully connected within me I have little access to The Holy Spirit.  I’ve always kind of thought The Holy Spirit replaced my spirit.  Instead, I’m seeing that they work hand in hand when I am awake to my own spirit.  I’ve said many times that dad’s words were to kill that spirit of mine.  Somehow, he did a pretty good job.  I had blocked my belief that my spirit was profitable and I’d need to do a good job with whatever I was doing.  Also, my brother’s abuse only fed my worthlessness.  God’s Holy Spirit would build my value, I hoped.  A major problem with me was I had learned to not live in the present–it was too painful.  I lived in my mind in the future where all the pain was gone.  The Holy Spirit acts in the present however so until I found my spirit in the present, The Holy Spirit was more silent waiting for me to arrive here.

I’m not sure this is making good sense but I am awakening to a reality I want to understand and live each day.  So, I’ll likely be writing more in days ahead.  To God be all Glory!