It isn’t often one finds another person with a spirit/passion that seems to match/challenge your own. There is a gentleman who began coming for counseling a couple months ago. I’ve known him since he was a young married man but never gotten to know him until now. As we began to address his reason for coming, he kept talking about his need to grow in his relationship with Jesus. More recently we have begun to work through a book study called: What’s so Spiritual About Your Gifts? It is a marvelous little book that brings you deeply into your awareness of yourself and The Holy Spirit. In doing this one can’t help but also address how close you are to Jesus Himself since He is the very One who gave us the Gift of The Holy Spirit.

Well, in the few weeks we have begun this work, I look forward to this meeting. Not only do I enjoy greatly my own growth with God’s Holy Spirit, but experiencing the joy of working with someone else who is so grateful to begin to find his own connection with God’s Spirit.

There is so much richness in not only knowing more about God’s Spirit, but to begin to hear Him, trust HIm, and obey Him is a very different story. I’ve been working on this relationship, The Holy Spirit and me, for a while. Now it is so nice to have another joining this adventure of genuine submission. It sure brings out my own selfishness so I must face it and give it over to God’s Spirit within me. It isn’t a one time thing, but a daily (and often many times a day) surrender. Right now, I’m surrendered!

I was able to meet with a gentleman yesterday for lunch who is leading a biblical counseling ministry and a Celebrate Recovery ministry in his church in a neighboring town. He actually has been working with the counseling ministry about the same amount of time as I have. It was nice to meet him and find someone I can work with close by as the ministries continue. He seemed pleased with this too. The thing I am always amazed with is finding each and every one of us has a story–a past. His story is very different from my own, but it is one he has struggled with for most of his years. He is now able to use his story through God’s Work with others needing his help. I should expect this by now, but each time I am simply amazed with what God does through His kids.

This morning I just want to thank God for His endless mercy and grace He bestows on each one of us. What a gracious and loving Father we get to serve!

There have been moments in the past few years when I felt inspired to write a last section of my book, The Journey From Error to Heir. If I ever do this I know its title would be “Living in Freedom”. This would follow, “Finding Freedom”. I use to think that God would wipe away every memory of my childhood abuse and all that it did to my belief system. I wouldn’t have any fears, temptations, etc., regarding any of it. I would be “normal” like everyone else. I write this because I’ve found that living in freedom doesn’t have anything at all like I had thought.

Living in freedom has some amazing realities that I am now understanding and deeply appreciating. These realities are ones like: remembering one’s past but having little if any bondage attached to it. I can share it and use it for others without the crippling anxiety I use to know all too well. I can have a temptation without it making me think I’m now just like dad or just like my brother. Temptations are something we all experience just because we are flesh. They don’t make us just like anyone else unless we are to act on the tempation like someone else did. Probably the most wonderful reality of all for me is that I know I am loved by God. I never have to earn His Love, He already lavishes me in it. All that I get to do for Him is out of sheer humility and thankfulness and no longer hoping it’s good enough to earn God’s Love.

What a wonderful Savior and Lord our God is for giving us His One and only Son–Jesus and sharing His Precious Holy Spirit to live within us!

Yesterday I mentioned the young men who are in the small group that meets on Saturday mornings. I was, once again, so impressed with the willingness of each one, particularly the one who has been hurting so much of late,. Their willingness to be open regarding where they are. In fact, their responses reminded me that much of their spiritual life is still being developed. Their lives haven’t taken them through their present struggles to then know what the grace of God is truly like as we move through struggles to find the victories. They are living through their first real life battles. So, they express their hope, and for the one, his dwindling hope. As we got to the end of the session I was able to express to them a life’s timeline for myself where I felt just exactly as they have said, but today, I have not only lived through that battle, but others which have occurred along life’s journey. One will find God’s faithfulness if one just doesn’t give up. Well, they aren’t going to give up and that just makes me fill with joy.

I have lived 50 years beyond where a couple of these men are presently in their journey. There weren’t tools all those years ago for someone like me and even if there were, they certainly weren’t part of the church’s work for individuals struggling as I had. But, God does have a miraculous way of keeping us with a thread of hope from His Holy Spirit within. I can’t fathom what life would have been like without this stable voice within.

My devotional messages of late have been centered around the choice God gave to man. He never has wanted us to be slaves to Him only obeying Him out of servanthood with no choice at all. Having been so awakened to this for myself of late, I see during each day how often I make choices without even thinking of God.

This morning the small group of men are meeting I have been working with for a year addressing the topic of porn/sexual addiction. One of the young men is going through a very tough time in his life. The lesson for today is a tough one having the participant delve deeply into his past and seeing its effect on one’s present. While I was doing the lesson earlier this week I thought about having to do this lesson while I was in my 20’s. Well, I don’t think I would even have done it. I was so steeled off to my emotions at that point in my life I wouldn’t have thought the lesson was relevant for me. This is not the case for this young man.

As I was journaling this morning I asked Jesus to help this young man glean from this morning just what He would want. I then needed to separate my own wishes from this request knowing Jesus is the great healer. I hurt for him and I would want to quicken the recovery for him as though I could do this. Jesus kindly reminded me to stay focused on Him and me and let Him be the critical focus for this young man and each of the others.

God is so kind, yet very clear with His messages. I want to be a good listener and responder to Him.

Yesterday’s message about my manipulation has haunted me every since I became fully awake to just how much I’ve used it. I desperately controlled the secret of my past and its bondage over me for most of my lifetime. Good grief, I think about all of the times I said no to something I was invited to do just because one might find out “who I really am” if I were to participate in whatever the event was. I could not take that risk, I thought. I’ve needed to confess to God my sinfulness in all of this and have now done it. Yes, I know I’m forgiven and it is time for me to let it go so God can use even this as a tool for His Work.

Last night’s concert for Celebrate Recovery was a great time to see just how much God wanted me to awaken to this truth. More than once did I hear afterwards how they felt God’s Holy Spirit’s presence during this time. All of this time I just kept praising God and thanking Him for never quitting on me. I’ve always wanted to be a good servant to God, but little did I know how much I was wanting to control what this “servant” did. Well, I’m much more awake to my flesh now and humbly admit it. God is so AMAZING!

Tonight our quartet will sing for our Celebrate Recovery. God, through His gentle, but firm ways, has brought me full circle. I have moved from dreading this to anticipating it. God has helped me move from this time being all about myself and my past to being all about Him and everyone’s present and future. Just as He has helped me through many years to move from the bondage of my past to the present times when I get to use my past as His tool, He has shown me that tonight He will use music as a means to help others believe what has been kept in unbelief.

I’ve never wanted to be a controlling person. Yet, as I look at how I’ve manipulated over the years our quartet never singing for our group, I see my manipulation clearly. All I can say to this is I’m so grateful to now anticipate Jesus and His Holy Spirit showing up tonight and I get to be part of it. What a blessing and joy it is to be part of God’s Work in helping others find just what God has given.

I PRAISE GOD!

There are several things on my mind this morning I want to include in today’s message. The most important one is one that Lois, my prayer warrior, sent me. It is the message behind the statement–the thief of devotion. If you are like me you have devotions each day. The root word of devotions is devote. So, of course, devotions are to center around who I devote my day/time to. That is to be Jesus and I intend for my devotions to be just that. However, if I spend an ample amount of thinking time fearing this or that, anxious about this or that, my devotion looks more like attention to these things. These become the thief of my devotion.

The message that became clear to me is my need to flip the coin over. What is on the other side of my fear/anxiousness? When I give these fears/anxieties to Jesus, and respond to Him rather than to my fear, I can expect Jesus victory, Jesus peace, Jesus assurance, and more! Why in the world would I ever want to remain in fear/anxiety when I can rest in the assurance of Jesus’ leadership and completion of what He asks me to do?

My devotion to Christ Jesus, God my Father and the precious Holy Spirit needs me to use any fear/anxiety as a reminder to shift gears into TRUST, BELIEVE and to have FAITH. The sooner I do this, the faster I have peace and assurance the outcome is in God’s Hands–not mine. I’m a worker of God’s assignments. I praise God instead of plead with Him. Boy, do I love this message!

There are times when one just has to surrender all and simply let God do whatever He does in crisis moments. I had a call yesterday afternoon telling me that a cousin, son of my older brother Don, had taken his life that morning. My brother is a widow and his only son has lived with him these past years. No one suspected anything like this. He was a quiet man who had never married but seemed “OK” with life as it has been. Little do we know what troubles a soul when it is kept solely within. I’m grateful my cousin didn’t do this at home. He had driven a short distance away and the sheriff found him. Don’s daughter and family live about 30 minutes away which is comforting for Don. All of us ache for him and the rest of his family.

These times when the choice God gave to all mankind is used for such awful things, I wish God would change His mind and take it away. There is no going back and helping my cousin with his struggle/s. Now, only God can provide the comfort He promises when we come to Him. My brother and niece will be doing this. When I called him yesterday he was just in shock as we all were and are.

God is good and I trust and know that God will give what only He can give–Peace that passeth all understanding. Oh, God, I place them in Your Hands.

I will sometimes take a quote from my devotional to express what point I’d like to make in the day’s entry. Today is one of these days. I am one of those people who know perfection is something I will never complete in the flesh. Yet, in spite of this knowledge I am “sort of” driven to be as perfect as possible. So, when I read today’s devotional message I was struck with its clarity. Here it is.

GOD’S PERFECT WILL:

“When we read the word perfect, we ay be daunted by thoughts of having to maintain a flawless walk with the Lord, but that is not what is intended by the word there. The Greek word teleias that is used is better translated as finished, brought to maturity, enabled to reach the goal, or needing nothing for completeness. In other words, the Lord already has a comprehensive and trustworthy strategy for leading you all the way to the victory.”

When I read this I couldn’t help but sense a deep message God wants you and me to understand. He knows the weakness of our flesh and that’s why He gave us His Son Jesus. He is bringing us to maturity and enabling us to reach His goal and He needs nothing but our cooperation in order for the goal to be completed. We are on our way to VICTORY!