Have you ever had a day of blessings? Yesterday was one of those days. The sermon heard at church was an outstanding one recognizing David’s assurance of God and his confidence in God using him. We were asked if we had this confidence in God that David had? All I could think was what my confidence use to be like compared to today. I use to have great confidence in God using others. I just thought God didn’t care much for me so my focus was never to light on myself for that hurt too much.

I began to find my confidence when I began to find God in every aspect of my past. But, as I write this I’m awakened to something I’ve not addressed and that is the hurt of my dad’s words. The counseling/therapy focused on the sexual use of me and disallowing that to be my identity. So much of my belief about myself however was coupled with my dad’s destructive words of my value to him. I’ll have to spend a little more time with God on this one.

After getting home from church I went to see Lois, my prayer warrior. As we finished our conversation and I gave her a parting hug, she began to get teary which is not common for her. She told me how much I mean to her and how proud she is of me–her “other son”. I got all teary too! She said I know you struggle to believe your value, but it is there and God sees it. At 74 years old I felt for a moment like the little boy hearing dad’s ugly comments and now those ugly words were being overruled by this saint of God. What I do know for certain is how grateful I am for God never giving up on me and using all of this past of mine to help others today. GOD IS SO GOOD!