Every since I was asked to start the counseling program at our church I’ve relied on an individual who is a retired christian counselor I deeply respect. She joined the team and has been my “go to” every since. As I went to her last night at our Celebrate Recovery dinner time and asked for some guidance in a new case I’m counseling this morning, I was told she would be leaving us in the near future due to some personal reasons. She is willing to continue assisting as I come up against deep issues and need her advice.

Until last night I had no idea how much my confidence depended on her proximity. As I brought all of this to Jesus this morning I was reminded just what He has been speaking to me about all this week–TRUST. In the past couple of years I’ve learned to trust Jesus in ways I never had before. Just taking on the assignment of starting a counseling ministry and getting myself prepared to participate as a counselor was a huge step. However, that wasn’t all Jesus had in mind. He wants me to learn what the depth of trust looks like. What I’m finding is that no matter how ugly the issue, He is always the answer. Finding the confidence in Christ as Healer is great. But, keeping myself in the role of facilitator trusting Jesus’ Holy Spirit to bring out the right words at the right time (using me), well, it is one client at a time. I keep fearing I will be incompetent (looking only at me) rather than looking to Jesus and trusting Jesus in each situation.

I couldn’t sleep past 3:50 am this morning. I’ve needed to spend this time talking to God and listening to Him only to find His assurance that He never leaves and is always present and leading. I can fully trust Him and be assured of this. In the 2+ years of now working with the counseling I’ve known this to be true. Today, and this day forward, He wants me to rest in this assurance, not anguish in it. So, OK, I’m stepping into this day with a greater/deeper assurance! I will PRAISE Him instead of anguish in fear.