These past several weeks have been emotionally draining for me in a manner for which I had no idea. During these weeks we have added two new counselors to our team. One of these will be taking over my role as the head of the ministry. I’d asked for this a few months ago so I could just focus on those I counsel. I felt as though God was nudging for this. This new director will start in October. Along with this our quartet has been quite active and I’ve shared my story several times. Monday was the podcast interview which took almost two hours (I had no idea how emotionally draining this would be.) Company has been with us for the past week and just yesterday early morning I took the last of the company to the airport. Along with this, Kathy left yesterday for Joseph OR to be with her sis until Sunday. The day was spent in counseling sessions for me.
As I got up this morning to a very quiet house I felt as though I’d been hit by an emotional freight train. I was drained! As I began my devotional time I started journaling telling Jesus just how drained I felt. That took a couple of pages in the journal. Then, I asked my daily question asking what Jesus wanted me to know from Him for today? It was then I wrote what I heard–the voice said, “Son, this isn’t Jesus today but His Father, your Heavenly Father. I am here to fill your ‘spirit tank’. In the next several minutes that was just what He did too!
There is nothing like a moment with God Himself to restore and focus one’s priorities. I wanted selfishness for a moment and He wanted selflessness so He could restore what flesh never does. How I love this precious TEAM–Heavenly Father, Jesus Christ and The Holy Spirit!
It has been almost a month since I wrote an entry to my blog. But, today I have been compelled to add a new one. A week ago yesterday our quartet sang for an event in the neighboring town of Nampa, ID. A song we were singing is titled: He Didn’t Throw the Clay Away. The lyrics fit my story rather well and our lead wanted me to give a brief testimony of my story coinciding with the song’s message. When we were done singing a gentleman came up to me asking if he and his wife could interview me for the potcast they do? Well, later this morning the interview will be taking place. I know that podcasts are a present means of current day communication. I just haven’t done anything with this means since I left the educational consulting world. In those days I listened to podcasts of educational leaders for insights in my own consulting work.
I have dealt with a good deal of spiritual warfare in my lifetime. When I was faced with “coming clean” with the truth of my past I would be greatly attacked. This time has been no different, however, the attacks have been different. I no longer have the bondage from my past abuse. I’m free to tell it. However, the fact I still have tempations is what hits me squarely. Shouldn’t I be free of lustful passion? After all, I do counseling to help those who struggle with this. What is wrong with you, you two-faced man? These are just some of the attacks.
This morning as I journaled I was nudged by God’s Holy Spirit to reach out to my accountability partner and to my prayer warrior which I did. Then, as I finished my devotional time I was led to write this entry. Satan doesn’t let up no matter what amount of freedom we have found. He twists truths to seem weak which in our flesh they are. However, God’s truths are strong when we surrender our flesh so the Power of the Holy Spirit can be our strength. This is what I Corinthians 10:13 is all about. So, this morning I will go in freedom! Thank you Jesus!
Living the life of an heir rather than an error.
Earnie Lewis 