This morning as I began to journal I couldn’t help but thank Jesus for the abundant blessings of yesterday. The time with our friend last night was so nice. Our quartet has sung for a number of folks over the years who were losing their battle of life on earth. Never, however, have we sung for someone in this case like last night. When we arrived, the four of us with our wives (8 total), there were a dozen family and friends there. More arrived as the evening wore on. It was as though Penny was having a party. It was festive and joyous just as Penny has always been throughout her life. Instead of needing to quit after a couple of songs we were encouraged to sing more, sing more! God is so amazing!
As I continued to journal I was writing about a decision that needs to be made regarding a gentleman who wants to join our counseling team. He is new to me and has an overwhelming personality on a positive side, but… A decision doesn’t need to be made immediately, he expresses a longing to be part of this ministry. As I was journaling about this decision, I asked Jesus for His Light to shine on His response. Later in my journaling I asked the question of Jesus I do each morning. I wrote: ”Jesus, what do You want me to know from You for today?” Instantly I heard this, “You are asking for my Light to shine on a decision that is not to be made today. I want you to trust Me knowing I will shed this Light when the time for the decision is ready. Remember that your commitment for this year is to keep focused on Me–I AM each day and to trust, not fret, for the decisions of the future.”
I needed this message today to drive home a deeply rooted worry I have when it comes to the work I do. God is teaching me that He WILL come through when His time is right–not mine. TRUST and not fret is my goal for today. Uprooting this worrisome habit of mine is needed!
Yesterday morning started with a visit to the hospital for our dear friend who is succumbing to cancer. They moved her home with hospice care yesterday afternoon. Our quartet is going there tonight to sing her favorite songs for her. While we were at the hospital one of our pastors and wife came. The wife asked Penny what she was hearing from God’s Spirit? Penny immediately said, “I’m just made to realize how insignificant the details of life are in comparison to where I am going. I have a peace I cannot explain.” It makes letting go a little easier when I hear this.
There is a calling God has for each one of us. The first seems always to be to accept His Son Jesus as our Savior inviting Him into our lives. The second calling is the one to make Jesus the Lord of our life. This second calling is the one that has consumed me, haunted me and awakened me to the reality of my humanness/weakness along side of Christ’s Strength and Power. I have longed for Christ’s Power to be mine so I would never fall prey to temptations of the flesh. Today I am finally seeing that in order to live with Christ’s Strength and Power as my own I am to do so keeping focused only on today. The great I AM is with me today and if I stay awake to this I will rely on HIM rather than on me.
Several years ago I read the biography of Mother Teresa. I wanted to know how someone could be so strong in the Lord. One particular story in it told of her flying to Mexico to address some major issues a town was having. When she was asked who was meeting her at the airport, she didn’t know. All she knew was that she was to go there. She went on to say that she also knew God had the plans/details in place otherwise she wouldn’t have been nudged to go. This FAITH and TRUST is what I know Jesus wants me (each of us) to have in Him. This confidence in FAITH/TRUST is not just for Mother Teresa, it is for you and me. She practiced this one day at a time keeping her eyes on Jesus, her ears listening to His Voice and then to obey (not question) His Message. This has become my daily purpose.
Yesterday I mentioned in my post about life returning to a routine. I wrote how I function better in this environment. What is also connected to life returning to its routine is what “life” expects from you in this routine. Routine is not just about one living with structure, the world in which this structure abides has expectations in it. This reality truly hit home yesterday. For a few weeks I was not exposed to the needs of the ones in counseling. I was not exposed to the needs of our Celebrate Recovery ministry. My own family limited their needs knowing I needed to be with Kathy. Yesterday seemed to be the day when life returned to its normal pace. As I reflect on this today I smile thinking how much I forgot that “routine” has in it I had set aside.
What I mention in the above paragraph I can now place into my commitment for this year. I will put each of these needs into first: Keeping my eyes on Jesus, Listen to His Voice and then Obey His Commands. Taking a moment to keep these three actions in place as I live each day is amazingly doable when I keep in mind that this very day I AM is with me and already has in store what my part is to be. I am really young at this but I want to grow in this process each day ahead of me knowing to do this one day at a time. Thank YOU JESUS!
I just got home from taking our oldest grandson to the airport where he returns to the air force base where he is stationed. He’s such a fine young man. It makes grandpa proud to see him maturing and loving his walk with God.
Today I head back to counseling. I’m glad to get this restarted. I can only stand the randomness of “time off” for so long. I work much better with a predictable schedule.
As I began journaling before heading to the airport I wrote that today is day 2 of my three commitments. I cringed as I thought about obeying His commands for I know myself too well, I wrote. Instantly I was once again reminded that the commitment is only for today. Tomorrow will be a commitment when I get to tomorrow. My focus needs to stay only on today. One of God’s powerful names is I AM. Remembering that I AM is with me and I can rely solely on His Strength and not my weakness is a tremendous assurance. We will do this together. It makes me smile as I write this knowing for these 24 hours I have I AM with me. I have known this for years. Somehow I’m now beginning to live with this truth in my heart. Boy, is God ever GOOD!
WOW, A new year has begun. I’m usually very glad to have the previous year close, but this isn’t the case this morning. Yes, I’m fine with 2023 ending, but for the most part, the year was more about growing in Christ than it was about anything else.
As I began my journaling this morning I was reflecting on the past year and looking ahead into this new one. I instantly was brought to the three commitments I’ve made: Eyes on Christ alone, Listen to His Voice & Obey His Commands. The first two I can work on and feel these are doable. The 3rd, well, I have become well aware of my selfishness in my flesh. I use to compare my flesh/desires with my brother and/or my dad. In so doing I could feel ok about my sin/s even though I knew I sinned. Mine weren’t as evil or hurtful as theirs were to me. These past few years have taken my eyes off of them and onto my One and only Savior and Lord–Jesus Christ. I now accept and see my sins as no different in the eyes of God than those of my brother or dad. They are both forgiven and in heaven and I am forgiven too. All of this to say that as I journaled I told Jesus that I didn’t think I was strong enough to obey His commands. As I wrote this I was instantly reminded that I CAN do this remembering that I do it one day at a time. In today I AM is with me and I can rely on His Strength. I don’t need to rely on my weakness.
God is amazing and I love starting this year with the assurance of His Promises. He is the GREAT I AM! And, I AM is with me each and every new day. Praise His Holy and Precious Name!
Today brings to a close this year of 2023. I’ve already journaled some of the strengths of the year. My most selfish strength of the year was the bountiful garden it provided. Everything I planted yielded well and that is not common, but it sure is appreciated! I’ve also loved and appreciated what God is teaching me through the counseling program. Even though Kathy’s stroke was said to be mild, there is nothing mild about the reality of it and its impact on our daily living. It has awakened both of us to the frailty of our life in its flesh. I know this life is temporary, but until something like this happens, I sure have taken it for granted.
What I wrote yesterday is paramount for me this year. If I am going to live for Christ, I don’t want any longer to put boundaries around what it is to look like. Being fully obedient to Christ in all aspects of living is my commitment for the coming year and for the rest of my life. I’m sure this will be challenged as each day comes, but I want to be steadfast in my commitment. As I close out this year, I will do so with thanksgiving in my heart and a firm desire to begin the new year devoted to living out Christ’s calling within me. I know to live this out one day at a time.
As this year is drawing to a close I am being convicted to heighten my attention to three items I have highlighted at the top of my prayer list. They are:
Eyes on Christ Alone
Listen to His Voice
Obey His Commands
As I have been living through this year, I have been repeatedly nudged to grow in my intimate walk with God, Jesus and The Holy Spirit. For months I only had #1 on the top of my list. I then realized if I am to grow in this intimacy I needed to listen carefully to Christ’s nudges–His Holy Spirit within me. Lastly and extremely important, if I’m to be truly intimate with Christ, I must obey what His nudges say. It is then that intimacy can grow and complete itself. Following all three of these steps as I live out each day completes my Trust, my Faith, my Confidence in Jesus Christ being Lord of my life.
I’ve lived so long putting parameters around the obedience to Christ’s voice thinking I could trust “this much”. Little, at the time, did I realize how that limited the intimacy–trust I had in Christ being Lord. Today and every today for the rest of my life, I want to live out these three steps. These are not to be suggestions, but commands. Following them grows a desire for the most precious intimacy one can ever know!
Last night Kathy and I went to Celebrate Recovery (CR). It was Kathy’s maiden voyage returning for the large group time. She didn’t stay for small group, but it was so nice to have this step develop. I did stay for small group and afterwards I asked how it went for her? She said she was glad she went and the amount of time was just right.
My focus these past several weeks has been centered around what is best for Kathy. Last night, having stayed for the entire time of CR, I realized just how much I missed it. The genuineness of conversation, the truth of one’s struggles and the truth of God’s Mercy and Grace abounds in this ministry. I needed to hear the testimony given and hear again how God is using this man’s past to help others with their present life. The small group time following the testimony gave truth to this.
I enjoyed greatly the testimony, but what struck me more than anything was just how important it is to have an environment where the truth of one’s struggle can be talked about openly without judgment and criticism. Instead, there is support and guidance with reminders that we live out our lives one day at a time. We don’t need to worry about tomorrow for God is present today. Tomorrow will take care of itself when we arrive for God will arrive there with us. Wow! Simple truth but amazingly difficult to keep in place. With the help of accountability and God’s Spirit within us, we can do this!
The kids are on their way back to Oklahoma. The house is quiet and this time it stays that way. Only our oldest grandson is here and will be until after New Years. He is a quiet soul anyway and will be a great help in putting the house back in order helping grandma with the chores she usually does at this point.
Little by little life will return to some type of normalcy. What I know more than ever before is that what I have called normal will still be temporary. God has never intended for our earthly life to be permanent. It is a time to find Jesus, decide if we are going to believe in Him and bring Him into our lives. We can then decide if we will serve Him with all of our heart, mind and soul. Following this life will be one that is eternal where all of life’s woes will be behind us and will no longer have any control or temptation to control us. I look forward to this eternal time. Yet, I have grown to enjoy each of the days we presently have living them for one purpose and that is to glorify our Lord and Savior–Jesus Christ.
When I was in college so long ago I remember a professor explaining how degrees from college work. As a novice student I thought that the more degrees one had the smarter he was in everything. However, I was told it is just the opposite. The higher the degree the more intricate knowledge one has in a small area of a topic. Now that I’m at the age I am I find myself knowing less and less. A big difference is that now I know this and I’m ok with it. When I was younger I thought I was stupid if I didn’t know. Now I realize just how true the statement was the professor told.
I wrote yesterday that I’m into Revelation in my Bible reading. There is an immense amount of this book that goes beyond my comprehension. As I was reading my portion this morning I realized again that all of this is going to come about, but what’s important for today is what I have written on the top of my prayer list: 1) Keep my eyes of Jesus; 2) Listen to His voice; 3) Obey His commands.
I don’t care as much about what one has learned from man’s institutions, what is truly important for daily living are these three items. They are my assignments each and every day.
Earnie Lewis 