Last night’s Celebrate Recovery lesson was “Powerless”. It follows lesson 1 which is Denial. Once we step out of denial and realize the problem we face, the struggle we can’t overcome, etc., we then must realize that within our own selves we are powerless to stop the addiction, struggle, hurt, etc., without the power of God Himself. All of this is good to KNOW, but finding God’s Strength to do all of this is not necessarily easy. Our pride truly gets in the way!

Last night I taught this lesson and it brings back SO many memories of my own need to finally realize how much I thought I needed control of all my hurts and habits so NO ONE would know about them. I had so many fears that I’d lose my job, my church, my friends and family if they knew. Even after my beginning years of counsel I kept in control of who knew my story so that the community, which included our church, wouldn’t know. Even my family didn’t know until I finally had gotten to the place where I was going to write my autobiography which then started this blog. I didn’t want my siblings finding out their brother had written a book which “exposed” them as though they were the problem.

God is so Amazing! Once I stepped into vulnerability letting God take control of my “mess” did this “protected by me” mess turn into a message God uses. Equally amazing is that I found no judgment in people hearing my story. Instead, I would always have ones want to talk because they had their own story which hadn’t been told, but they felt now like they could and should.

Well, stepping out of powerlessness and into obedience to God took me lots of years and even today I need constant reminders to not hide. Always though, God’s gentle voice reminds me, “I’ve got this–do not be afraid!”