Tag Archives: life

THE JOURNEY CONTINUES: NOV. 21, 2025

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Earlier this week I wrote about my need to release my zeal to complete a work I wasn’t intended to complete. My timing and God’s timing were not aligning. I needed to realize that my efforts were a hindrance rather than a help. So, on Tuesday of this week I gave it all back to Jesus confessing my willfulness. I actually lived Tuesday in a peacefulness I hadn’t had for a couple of weeks. Then came Wednesday.

Wednesday morning I got a text from a co-leader in our Celebrate Recovery group. She was asking if I’d ever had a response from our friend. She was praying for this to happen. I told her I hadn’t and it was just sad. Because of her text I opened my Monday text to my friend to see that this text had been “read” and not just delivered. So I wrote three words to him in a text: “Are you interested?” Within 10 minutes my cell rang and it was him. We talked for 30 minutes and he just couldn’t express enough how much he wanted to take this offer. Wednesday night we talked even more and the steps are now being taken to have all of this come together.

I write this today in sheer thansgiving for the way God works. For two weeks I had wanted to take God’s original nudge to help this friend and make it a fun moment of letting him know how much he was loved and show this by all the details that had been already put together. All he needed to do was accept it. Problem: it looked too much like me. God wanted me to back away so He became the sole giver of HELP. I was a helper and was to be just that. Today I rejoice in learning another lesson from my Savior, Lord, TEACHER and dearest friend!

THE JOURNEY CONTINUES: MAY 9, 2025

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Have you ever thought through why we hold our problems in instead of letting them be known so we can have help? Our Celebrate Recovery lesson last night was AMENDS. The author of the material makes AMENDS an acrostic. The first letter–A stands for admit your hurts and harm. For some reason last night (even though I’ve heard this lesson no less than 18 times and taught it in step studies at least that many also) I was hit with the “harm” part.

As I began Celebrate Recovery 18 years ago with the help of 6 others, I began to address the hurt of my past. After a year I started the 3.5 years of counseling as well as attending CR. I fully addressed the hurts of my past. I also stepped into the harm with the help of the counselor, but I didn’t fully resolve them. The one “character defect”–harm, I was left with is having gay thoughts. I’ve never acted on them but they do cross my mind. Having these has always made me feel as though I’m like my brother even though I know better. It has been an entry point for evil’s attacks on my identity and value.

I’ve talked about this a few times and even written about it. Last night’s lesson brought home the reality that it is one thing to confess this, it is another thing to bring it before God’s Light so I can be OK with it. We all have these “character defects” in our beliefs we must deal with. Well, this one is mine. My counselor, years back, even asked me in one session if I thought it made me “less than” others? Of course I did! It made me like my brother I said. However, he acted on it for years with me and I’ve never acted on it with anyone. We share a temptation and that’s it.

Today I thank God for helping me see HIs Light in this struggle I’ve dealt with for SO LONG. I can praise God for being so faithful in helping me to never succumb to this. What a blessed God we get to serve!

THE JOURNEY CONTINUES: MAY 3, 2025

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My two local brothers and wives got together with my wife and me last night at a restaurant. It was a good chance to catch up on family details like my nephew who is battling brain cancer. He is in radiation and chemo treatment now for 6 weeks when they will run new tests to see how the cancer is responding. Then they will decide the next step: surgery, continued treatment, etc. As the conversation shifted, a sister-in-law brought up our dad and some of his behaviors that we sons resemble once in a while. It’s never a compliment to me to think this, but there is truth in it I have to admit.

The key point that the conversation brought out which I pondered this morning was what drives our behaviors, actions, decisions. Dad seemed to let his emotions determine his behaviors, decisions and actions. These could be fun when he’d decide at the spur of the moment to go fishing at night when we had the milking done. At Christmas time he’d decide one day we would drive to California and see our family there. Those times will always be remembered as fun. On the other hand, his words, his behaviors towards his farming work, his discipline of us, his church attendance were all built around “how he felt”. If he made commitments, even they were followed through from emotions and so most commitments were never followed through.

This morning God was pointing out that commitments couldn’t be completed by emotions–they are too fickle. Emotions can help us complete commitments but we have to disciple ourselves to do this. I’ve never thought this through to this extent. I just knew I’d never let my emotions rule my life as dad had. The topic of a person’s emotions often comes up in a counseling session. God was pointing out a clear point for me I can use for myself and for others in days ahead. HE is so good at doing this!