Before I started today’s blog I reread yesterday’s entry.  I did this because yesterday’s writing was expressing a revelation God had made for me.  As I began today with my  daily devotions I found myself feeling drained physically and emotionally.  I wrote in my journal that I felt like an empty reservoir now ready for spring snow melt and rainfall.  Yet, it is August 1.  I also knew that speaking for the detention center teens last night was very draining.  I was feeling the results of it.  The kids, about 30 total, were very attentive during the talk and then the last 30 minutes were their questions.  During this time the revelations of their stories, their abandonment, their literal training from home to lie about the truth of their lives, etc., were overwhelming.  At the moment when I was in front and attempting to listen to them and respond with the Holy Spirit’s lead I felt empowered.  This morning is different.  I’m left with these kids’ faces looking at me, the stories I heard from them, and the knowledge that they are at the age I was when the abuse was still happening or had just about ended.  Yet, they don’t need to live another 50 years in secrecy, isolation, choosing poorly and ending in jail/prison as many of their own relatives–and they themselves are in this center.

Their questions about how to find God, how to hear God, are difficult–I had the same ones at that age.  God lived in my heart but accessing help from Him didn’t seem to happen.  Only now do I see the handiwork He was doing.  The one lad, most troubled with his torment, came up afterwards apologizing for some of his outbursts during the questioning time.  He said he just didn’t know what to do.  I asked him if he knew what not to do?  He said he knew that much.  I told him to simply do that much.  At that point of “not doing” ask God for His Light in what to do.  This is the step of faith.  That much seemed to register with him.  Everyone of these young people is a treasure to God but for most of them, they don’t know that and I didn’t either at that age.  Join me in praying for them.

After getting home last night I went out to cover the swimming pool.  My granddaughter and her friend had been out in it while we were gone.  It was getting dark so I was in a hurry.  As I was walking the edge of the pool I got too close to the pool’s edge and slipped into it.  My cell phone was in the pocket of my shorts so it is now dead.  Somehow this jolts me back to reality.  I’m going to court this morning for one of the guys in our Celebrate Recovery and then I’ll head to the Apple Store.