Today is my second grandson’s birthday.  He is a teenager as of today.  He has been my buddy since the day he was born.  I pray God’s special anointing upon him.

I wonder what man’s ego was intended to be when God created us originally?  In the human flesh it fights so much with spirit-filled living wanting things to go just our way so we are comfortable.  Yet, God has given us choice so we can choose faith and trust challenging this ego-driven decision-making.  Somehow I find far more women able to do this faith and trust issue ahead of us men.  God reminds me that faith and trust are spirit words–they keep us in touch with spirit-filled living.  That makes me want to get much stronger at this as I truly want to live spirit-filled throughout each day.

God is also awakening me to just how much I weaken as the day continues.  I’m trying to figure out how I can strengthen my belief as the day continues but I haven’t been successful yet.  Celebrate Recovery tells us to reflect in our journals at the end of a day.  I need something mid afternoon.  I am asking God to show me what this is.  I’m sure it will challenge my ego because just writing this here as a confession is hard enough.  I’d like to think that at my age I’d be past this, but I’m afraid the struggle still exists of wanting to choose Earnie’s ways.