Well, the battle of the past couple days didn’t end with yesterday’s blog.  I was called at noon time yesterday by the gentleman who leads our 7-Pillars group for our accountability.  I told him my struggle with the lesson and the specifics of the struggle.  He thanked me for articulating it to him.  He talked to me about his own battle and we ended the call.  The battle raged throughout the afternoon within me.  When I finally got to class last night I really was not in a good place emotionally or mentally.  I had begun to question the commitments I’d made for doing “God’s work”.  In class I talked about the findings from the lesson.  The walk away from the lesson was to replace the lies with truth in God’s word about who I am to God–“I am fearfully and wonderfully made,” for example.

This morning’s devotions brought more clarity for me.  God reminded me where He has me working–in the very pits of human pain and emotional suffering caused by man’s sins.  The past three days of torment have been just that–tormenting.  However, God is reminding me of His love for me and then He reminded me how telling my story of His work in my life brings healing.  He said that there are many who are suffering with their identity with man and particularly their identity with Him.  They need to hear how God is healing this for me.  They need to know that our pain turns into His passion once He is able to help us find His love, purpose and healing.  The roots of abuse run deeply within our flesh, but thanks be to God–our Healer–He takes our hardships and makes them a “pathway to peace” as is stated in the Serenity Prayer.  Our need is to just to take one day at a time and even one moment at a time with God at the helm.  This is not easy work but it is so rewarding when we finally find God in it.  I love this about our God and Father–The Mighty Healer.