I have written many times of late about my need to grow in living in total submission to The Holy Spirit. How in the world can this be done? How do I stay in spirit during the day and not shift into my flesh? This happens so easily I never recognize it until much later in the day. Then I kick myself inside my emotions and apologize once again to Jesus and God’s Holy Spirit. Because of this new study I’m working through with 3 groups now, I have this ever before me.
This morning I was journaling about all of this. I had told the small group on Wednesday that I couldn’t find words to express this surrender keeping it solidly in place. I was in the midst of great confusion. So, in writing all of this out and then asking Jesus what He wanted me to know for today, this is what I heard Him tell me. “Living for me in spirit and truth is just what your Heavenly Father has commissioned you to do. He wants you to model Me this day as He sent Me to do so many years ago. This model is for you and for all My believers. Living in Spirit is how this is done. Living in Spirit prompts you to be vulnerable when you speak and not letting fear block your responses.”
There was more, but what hit me solidly was being vulnerable in all parts of my day. I doubt I’ve ever been vulnerable in my flesh. It is only when I submit to spirit that I am willing to be vulnerable. In fact, this is what hit me so boldly this morning. I know God wants me to be vulnerable and share what He puts on my heart. But living in flesh I don’t need to be that way–it isn’t fearful. Instead, I realize that in flesh is where I always stumble and often sin. Living in Spirit is being vulnerable. It is living in TRUST, FAITH, Confidence in God’s Holy Spirit’s leadership in me. This Jesus wants me (you and me) to live one day at a time for this is when His Holy Spirit is with us. Today I want to live this out!
I cannot even begin to describe in words this morning the joy of sitting at my desk and worshipping Jesus with worship songs playing in the background. I had thought it wouldn’t be any big deal to be gone 10 days without this blessing, but I was so wrong! Starting my day in my head rather than in spirit with Jesus is like nothing I can describe. God’s Holy Spirit so wants to join my spirit and yours too. I just cannot create in my mind what takes place when my spirit is awakened to Him.
As I began to read in I Peter this morning, Peter writes in chapter 1:5, …who through faith are shielded by God’s power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time.”; it stood out that we are shielded by GOD’S POWER. This power comes from God’s Holy SPIRIT.
I wrote only a month or so ago about starting my devotional time with worship music. Well, I took a 10 day break from it and I don’t ever want to do that again. Our minds cannot wrap itself around the truth of scripture for the truth is found in faith, trust, hope…. Only in these spiritual pillars can one find the POWER God promises to us. Our spirit recognizes our frailty in flesh our mind doesn’t want to admit. When we worship in spirit God’s Power becomes ours!
Last night at Celebrate Recovery I gave my testimony to our group. This is always a very emotional time for me reliving those days of childhood coupled with the years of recovery therapy. It is even more painful today to relive the old beliefs that I had about God, Jesus and The Holy Spirit. Celebrate Recovery calls these character defects and hang-ups. These are things life teaches us by our experiences more than by sheer lessons and they become false truths.
This morning as I arose I simply felt exhausted. I sat down with my coffee to start my devotional time. I opened my journal and wrote to Jesus just how emotionally spent I felt. I went on to attach this to the fact that I’m open today to my emotions and the very truth of life’s damages and also the truth that God our Father has a plan to take us through it with Him by our side holding us as we find Him in all aspects of our past. All of this is emotional energy spent. What I wasn’t expecting when I asked Jesus what He wanted me to know from Him for today, was His response. He said in part, “I want you to take a moment right now and rejoice. The JOY of the Lord awaits for you if you will just stop and rejoice in My Spirit.”
As this moment unfolded He reminded me of those in attendance who needed to hear His redemptive work and that He has this same opportunity for them. Taking the time to rejoice this morning brought humbling Light to the obedience of last night. “The Joy of the Lord is our STRENGTH,” (Nehemiah 8:10). Today this Joy became my strength replacing the emotional exhaustion. God just never stops being AMAZING!
My devotional time this morning has been, once again, filled with the presence of God’s Holy Spirit. How I’m loving having worship songs softly playing in the background reminding me to let my spirit be surrendered to God’s Holy Spirit. There is something miraculous that takes place as my anxious thoughts turn into opportunities for me to surrender them into the Hands of the Almighty.
In the midst of asking Jesus what He wanted me to know for today, I was told a message about a loved one that caught me off guard. This is the loved one I mentioned in last Monday’s post. Jesus was assuring me He had this person in the palm of His hand and I could trust Him. My immediate thought was, “this must be the voice of another spirit,” yet the voice was the voice I hear each morning as Christ talks to me. After a couple moments of struggling to believe, I simply told Jesus that this message is amazing and I will TRUST Him in this. I sure don’t want to be a doubting Thomas. I want to be a believing Earnie!
God never stops amazing me. I want my life to honor Him each and every day. Believing Him and Trusting His messages is a huge step in this direction. One day at a time, this is the one and only way to truly live for our Father.
Last night someone very important to me came over and shared a heavy burden with me–one that I’ve personally known well. This morning as I began my devotional time I had started the worship music but it did not easily awaken my spirit to God’s Holy Spirit. My mind kept running through all that today needed to accomplish. I had just journaled this struggle with Jesus when I heard His voice say to simply make a list so I could then release this. I did just that, grabbed a notepad and wrote all that I wanted to get done today and the burden left. I then could allow my spirit to easily surrender to The Holy Spirit.
As I journaled more I saw in my mind the ugly battle of God’s Holy Spirit standing before the person of last night’s conversation, defending them from the evil spirit wanting to take control. I began to see once again the Power of God’s Holy Spirit at work in our deepest woes. He is Mighty to Save and will do just that as we let our sorrows be turned over to Him.
Today is also the first anniversary of my good friend’s wife passing. I am accompanying him and one other couple to her gravesite at noon today. I had this friend over for dinner last Friday evening and we talked at length about his future and his purpose that seems lost. God’s Light was beginning to shine into this darkness for him as we talked. Today I pray God’s Light into the darkness of death allowing vision to return and celebration to be restored for a couple’s life well lived for Jesus Christ. Along with this I pray for Jesus to restore purpose for this man’s life to continue living for Jesus with vision and passion.
Worship is a powerful tool that I believe is so under used and understood. I am only beginning to see the critical importance of it. I’ve always loved worship music and worship time during a church service, However, having daily worship incorporated into my devotional time has taught me about “spirit” I never had thought. I use the word “thought” because I have always done my devotional time through my mind which is always thought about connected to flesh. It controls my body’s functions and it also mostly controls my actions. So, as I’ve added worship to my devotional time, I now am beginning to find what it is like to have this time controlled by Spirit which is eternal and is so much more powerful than my mind. When spirit takes control of this time my mind relaxes and releases the concerns it has. My whole body just relaxes and I find rejoicing so easy because I just want to rejoice instead of being anxious over anything. One other thing is that the messages for the day become clearer.
God’s Holy Spirit and our own spirit have always seemed mysterious to me even though I knew beyond any shadow of doubt that they were real. In spite of this knowing, I’ve relied on my mind to understand as best I could. Well, understanding Spirit is far more about what scripture has always taught us to do–TRUST, have FAITH, BELIEVE. This is spiritual language and today this language is growing for me!
God isn’t done with His awakening for me. This morning was another one of them. As I began to journal I was lamenting the struggles of late and the lessons attached to the struggles. I even asked Jesus when these struggles would finally cease? I was utterly amazed at His response, mainly because I wasn’t really expecting one. He said, “When you decide to praise Me when temptations/struggles hit, you will see the glory of My Work. Let your temptations be a reminder to PRAISE ME instead of a torment to run from. Satan wants to use these tempting moments to confuse you, shame you. You are learning that in worship of Me Satan has no place to reside. He sees Me instead of you. So, use these times, all struggling times as a reminder to PRAISE ME. Praising Me shows your complete TRUST in ME. This is what God your Father has been working to teach you.” Today you get it!
I wept! As I began to read my bible I was reading in the last chapter of II Timothy where Paul was encouraging Timothy. He told him to never give up the fight and to Preach the Word. Others would turn away, but keep himself focused on the goal–the final goal. How I Praise and Thank God for never giving up on me. Only GOD could ever take a past and turn it into a time of Praise and Worship! And of all things–use it to His Honor and Glory!
There is so much to continually praise God about. Stepping into praise of God disallows the concerns in one’s life to dominate one’s mind and emotions. It doesn’t remove the concerns, it just puts them into a category of release. I can trust God to do what He does and I’m not suppose to, and for me to see what part, if there is any.. Spending time each morning in true worship of God our Father awakens my spirit to His Holy Spirit. How I love this impact and clarity.
I have always wanted to serve God with my life. I’ve written so many times how this service would hopefully provide a love from God that would take away the images, the memories, the abuse and bitterness of my past. I thought that removing them would be the only way to obliterate the ongoing confusion in my mind, part of which was scriptures that said God loves us (me). Instead of honoring my prayers, God chose to realign them into trusting Him to use all of these memories as tools. Only God’s miraculous ways could ever turn torment into a tool of Light helping others believe their own torment can be healed and used by God.
My greatest healing is not the removal of these memories, it is the removal of the bitterness and replacing it with the desire to share them as needed for someone else caught in the devil’s trap believing God doesn’t care for you. For, God cares immensely! One just needs to allow Him entrance into the darkness of our soul where all of this bitterness is held and holding oneself captive.
I don’t know about you, the reader, but I have to admit my human weaknesses far more often than I wish were true. This morning as I was having my devotions I was reminded by Jesus that it is one thing to confess my weaknesses, but along with confession I must make a plan to address them. Then I was reminded that “faith without works is dead” (James 2:17). If I have faith that I can overcome my weaknesses but I don’t put effort into it, I am simply stuck with the weakness/es.
I attempt to give thoughtful advice to those who come for counsel. And, every once in a while, I am reminded that what I had just said, God wants me to put into my own practice. I then have to tell the one sitting across from me that “we can work on this together”.
As I have added worship music to my devotional time I am finding a renewed effort to confront flesh with Spirit. As my spirit awakens through worship it is accompanied with a passion beyond myself that I know is God’s Holy Spirit. He is the very One who will fight this battle, weakness, for me as I release my struggle to Him through my worship of Him. Worship is far more than singing a favorite chorus or hymn. It likely starts there, but God’s Spirit speaks to us in these times if we allow ourselves to listen. I am a newbie at this, but I want to continue growing for God’s Holy Spirit to be in full control of my everyday life.
HAPPY NEW YEAR! Welcome to the year of 2025. As light is just beginning to show the out of doors, I see the ground is covered with snow. We didn’t have a white Christmas, but we are having a white New Years. The rain and snow are blessed gifts to our area. We need it all each year to fill our reservoirs for the coming year of irrigation.
I was asked during the time our kids and grandkids were here, what I’d want sung and said at my funeral? I told them I wanted that service to be put together with things they wanted. I’d be dead and I’ve always wondered why people don’t put together a service that makes them feel better. As I have pondered this since being asked I’m realizing that a last remembrance is the purpose for the funeral. I’ve never liked the focus being on me for fear the ugliness of my life would be brought out and that’s what people would remember.
Getting to use the ugliness of a past as a tool in God’s toolbox to help others makes one’s past a Light, is nothing less than a miracle. Yesterday I met with a young man who had asked for counsel. I didn’t know him, but I know his wife rather well and all of his wife’s family. As he told me why he was seeking counsel I couldn’t help but identify with it. When he was mid-stream in telling me his story, he asked what the counseling sessions would do for him? I then said I’d like to give him some background on the person he is talking to once he’d finished giving me his background. When he was done I gave him a piece of my own story and what God has done for me. I concluded that this is what God wants to do with his past during the counseling sessions. He smiled big and said that he was really glad to be here.
When my time comes I want my service to glorify the God who brings such incredible healing and purpose to one’s life no matter what story it has attached to it. This is what I want people to remember as they leave my funeral service one day. Our God is faithful to the end!
Earnie Lewis 