Yesterday turned out to be one of the more troubling days, yet profitable days I’ve had in a while.  The projects and conference I mentioned were weighing heavily on me.  Also, today I am going to the in-service training beginning the consulting work starting up again.  I had allowed all of this weight on me to the point I was feeling very oppressed.  Yet, each time I took it to God I could not sense He was wanting me to release anyone of the work.

In the middle of yesterday afternoon the young man who is reading my book met with me for a 2nd time.  This time instead of the meeting being one of shame and regret, it was more about stepping out of the shame and regret to letting our past be a tool of God in our present.  This was actually encouraging to him.  It was also encouraging to me to see that he was getting so quickly what it took me years to understand.  After I’d gotten home and was barbecuing  our supper I got a text from him.  He was thanking me for the time spent.  He then said something that truly got to me.  He said how much others respected me both in the church setting as well as those outside the church in the community.  I thanked him for the kind words and finished my barbecuing.

This morning I was journaling yet again about all that I have on my plate and why God isn’t making it clear what I’m to do with it.  It was then that He pointed out that what is on my plate is what is on OUR plate.  He hadn’t placed this there for me to own.  He placed it there for me to do my part with His Work.  I was then set back into reality.  I was able to see that the weight of all this work at church and in the world was only weight because I was owning it instead of seeing clearly that my role is to do my part.  God already owns it–I need to let go.  So, I’m now writing this as a freer man.

The other piece of this for me is the clarity God has provided of late regarding His Work in the church as in the world.  I had on my own made a very wrong mindset thinking I needed to be spending my time with the church for that is truly where God is.  Sometimes He’s in the world but it was harder for me to know when “those” times were.  God has made it abundantly clear that He is in all settings IF I simply awaken to Him there.  The compliment from the young man awoke in me the reality that God is using me wherever I am.  I have always wanted to please Him and be His servant.  Today I will continue this but do so without that “man desire” to own the work.  I’m going to let Him be the Owner.