As my journey continues from freedom of being owned by my sins and those done to me, I find myself wanting to abandon all memories from my past so I can live the rest of my life having no connections to it.  Something I haven’t finished working through is when temptation arrives, what do I do when my past immediately floods before me?  When a temptation is sexual this is what happens.  I realize this is a work of Satan but what to do with it is still in the learning stage.  Now that I’m awake to this and know as much as I do, I need to write it.  This helps me own it rather than hide it.  It is a new phenomena too because I’ve not been at this point of recovery before.  I realize that as long as I’m a living human being I’ll have to deal with temptations.  I use to want to die so that I wouldn’t have to live with them any longer.  I know God wants me to live and I do too until my time comes.  I also know He wants me to learn that no sin is greater than His Power so in this I start by BELIEVING.  The right next steps will come.

Yesterday a good friend took one of my grandsons for the afternoon and helped him make 4 Christmas gifts for family members.  The friend is a retired vocational ed teacher and this grandson loves the use of tools so the time was fun for him and very productive.  This grandson doesn’t have a dad who connects with him so the event was even richer helping him know he is important to adult men.  God is so good putting people in our paths.  I love Him for this.   

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