Today is a new day. Last night was our class for Mending the Soul. As I was preparing for it, which is very different this year since it is my 2nd go round, I found myself going to very different places within me in response to the narratives to read and the questions to answer. Early childhood abuse has some awful, critical effects on the soul. No child can be in control of this. Each one is vulnerable to the “man” for which he is placed. I’ve never realized the depth of damage abuse causes until I finally got to these roots myself and actually faced them. A child buries this damage due to his inability to address them. As adults we deny their existence due to the hurt one doesn’t want to face or admit. My life has been filled with “doing” to better me for the relationships I’ve been given. Now I realize that all the doing I thought was giving me value was a lie of Satan. My value has come from my creation–the person God made me to be. The things I do are for God’s Kingdom. I’ve known that I’ve wanted to do God’s Kingdom work, I just thought if I did it well, He’d finally love me enough to take away the memories.
The truth that God makes all things new is truly a miracle. Instead of taking away the memories, He turns the memories into His surgical tools for which He does His healing work. As I’ve begun to face the damage of the past God has used my story to strengthen others to face their own. He uses other’s stories to help me realize what I still need to do/face. The result is this new creation God gave is now being freed of bondage that was rooted in the child created in God’s image. How I praise Him for this!