The meeting I said would take place yesterday afternoon did happen. We met for a couple hours talking through why all of this seemed so fearful to me. It was very helpful to simply get the anxiety spoken and out of my head. During the two hours we were together I could simply feel myself relaxing. It almost became funny to have let something like this take momentary control of oneself. I’ve spent so much of my life working to “not be”, it just didn’t occur to me that I already was created “to be”.
This morning’s devotional by Charles Spurgeon added another layer of wisdom for me. He talked about “great faith”. He brings out how important great faith is. Jesus only uses the term two times in scripture. One of the times was with the Roman centurion and the other was with the Canaanite woman. These are found in Matthew 8:10 and 15:28. Spurgeon said having little faith can be like having a chariot to ride in but without wheels. When we need to flee a situation or temptation we do so by dragging our chariot base with great burden. If we would simply put wheels on the chariot we can flee easily. Putting wheels on the chariot is a demonstration of great faith.
I asked God this morning to help me put wheels of faith on my belief. I want to be a man of great faith knowing there is nothing He won’t help us to overcome as long as our faith in Him is GREAT. He is GREAT so why have I questioned this for so long? Mark 9:24 says in part, “…I believe, help thou my unbelief.” God is doing just that!