Today wraps up the little book of Titus. I can’t begin to tell you how many times I’ve read these books Paul wrote over the past 50 years, but as I read them today I find wisdom I’ve missed until now. I wrote yesterday about my awakening to Grace. Yes, it softened my heart so I no longer judged people the way I had, but it has taken me another 40+ years to understand how to live by Grace rather than living by works. I know that one reason I have lived by works is that it is easy for me. I love work and I love being busy with worthwhile projects. What I’ve had to learn over and over again is that the works I do don’t earn me value with Jesus. I simply didn’t recognize until much more recently that the value I lacked was self-value. I was the one who needed to recognize that I was valuable just the way I am.
My prayer warrior introduced me to the 3-R’s: recognize, rebuke and replace a couple of years ago. Six to eight months later when I told her I recognized the lies which went through my head about my value to God and that I rebuked them, I just didn’t know how to use the third R–replace. What did I replace those lies with? It was then that she prayed over me and asked God to replace those lies with: self-love, self-appreciation and self-confidence (what I call the 3-S’s).
I now know I work because God inspired within me a love to do so. No longer do I work to earn. Yes, I am still addressing the 3-S’s. I know now that to love and appreciate myself is not arrogance as my dad continually yelled at me. It is the 3rd S–self-confidence. I have to remind myself of this fairly often as those voices try to sway me back to old habits of belief. The beauty of the 3-S’s for me has been being at peace with myself. God has been so patient getting me to this state of being. How I love Him for this patience!