Yesterday afternoon Kathy and I went to a birthday party for a little 2 year old boy. He is the son of the young man I went to lunch with last Monday. I believe I mentioned this in a blog earlier last week. This little boy’s dad had a very troubling childhood. When we went to lunch I gave him one of my books. He told me yesterday he had finished it. He also told me there were too many things alike between his grandma (his adopted mom) and my own dad. When his grandma saw me at the party her words to him were, “What in the h…. is he doing here?” He told me this because he felt bad she still harbored much resentment towards me. I told him to let that go. This was her problem, not his or mine. Back 20+ years ago when they were working to adopt him I had written a letter which describe some of my concerns about her ability to be an adopted mom. This young man’s life today still carries the weight of these wounds. I was glad to be there and besides, it was no surprise to me she felt this way. It only confirmed she hasn’t changed. The party was lots of fun and Kathy and I got to meet a number of people we would never have known otherwise. This young man is surrounding himself with good friends who are a good influence. I see him trying to please this “mom” just like I use to try and please dad. I hate to think it will never change, but he’s in his early 30’s and she is approaching 80 so I think the chances are growing slim.
As I was reading this morning in Proverbs there are many verses which describe yesterday. The haughtiness and pride of one’s attitude will drive people away from you. The tenderness and support of one’s attitude will be like a magnet to others who enjoy being with you. I remember my dad asking me why no one came to visit him in the nursing home? He died a lonely man. I’m afraid this lady will do the same unless there is a miraculous turn around. Only God can do this but we also must make this choice. God is Amazing. He wants us to be the same as we strive to live amazingly for Him.