Well, the halt is still present in this journey, but this morning I found something very unexpectedly. I’m reading Ezekiel. In the middle chapters of the book God takes Ezekiel in a dream to Jerusalem where He shows him the rebuilding of the temple. Ezekiel gets to see what it will look like and he also gets to see God inhabit it once again. Our pastor says there is nothing in the Bible written to just make it thicker but these detailed descriptions have never meant a great deal to a non-architectural mind like mine. However, as I began to journal I started to see some things I hadn’t before.
When the temple was complete the sacrifices were explained in detail regarding which animal and how it was to be sacrificed. In a split second I saw for a moment that God saw His people free from their sins due to the daily sacrifices. It didn’t change their behaviors however, for they went right on sinning–enough so that He simply changed the entire plan so that it was no longer something man did–it is what He did. He sent His own Son Jesus to become the once and for all sacrifice. Now, when God sees us through the blood of His Own Son’s sacrifice, He sees us as whole–cleansed by the blood of His Own Son’s sacrifice. If we accept Christ as our Savior, this work is done for us.
All of a sudden I could see that all the tormenting sins which I’ve thought tarnished me for life, are at that Cross of Christ–buried. In fact, as I was journaling all of this I sensed Christ saying, “You should see yourself the way I see you.” This makes me cry. The lessons I’m doing in this workbook regarding Abuse are only outlining for me all that Christ has buried. Now, He is asking me to let all of it be buried too. I can see myself as He sees me if I choose, and I will be so much freer to do His Will without the weight of this past holding me back. How many times will I need to let this past go? I suppose until the day I die? Maybe, but I sure feel grateful at this moment and so thankful for The GRACE of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ!