Yesterday turned into a wonderful day with a funeral service which was a celebration of a life well lived for God. Secondly, we were babysitting our two youngest granddaughters which was mostly Kathy with some assistance from me. Lastly, I did nothing to address the situation I wrote about yesterday. There was no nudge and there was no door opening.
During the night I awoke to find there wasn’t going to be sleep for a while. I tried praising God but that wasn’t bringing sleep. As I began to ask Jesus to help me with the struggle I explained yesterday He brought to mind the struggle I had with mom last February and March while I was still doing the class–Mending the Soul. It was the portion call “neglect” as a category of abuse. The class helped me see mom in an entirely different light. I always wanted to lift mom to a higher level than human. She was our family’s hero so she was like–superhuman. However, in real life, mom was human and I needed to let her be just that. The neglect I experienced was mom’s fear, confusion, helplessness in situations she felt powerless to do anything about except pray. That I know she did. My walking with God today has much to do with mom’s prayers so long ago.
This morning as I was journaling to Jesus about all of this He helped me to see Him for what He was and now is. First, Jesus was born into humanness with all the weaknesses of flesh. However, Jesus chose to not enter into the sins of flesh. Jesus’ life demonstrated for man that His belief in God His Father was demonstrated by His trusting and obeying. Today, He wants me to demonstrate my belief in Him by trusting and obeying Him. In this He proves His love for us by showing that my choice to do so will bring about His Will. My piece is to do my part as He nudges me. I am not to step ahead of a nudge for that is not obedience. These are big lessons for me, but I want to be a good student of Jesus trusting Him while I obey Him.