Today I wrestle with the fact that I’m back into the work schedule which I’ll have for the next 11 months. In addition to this, I have a load of prayer requests for which I want to see something done. Last night I got a call from dear friends that their son is again in jail. They have been battling this dilemma for a few years with him. Now it starts yet again. The other requests are quite different, but the thing they have in common is the need for God’s intervention and man to turn to Him. Just writing this reminds me of what I was journaling only minutes ago–these are for God’s work, not mine. I am to carry the needs to the throne of God’s Grace and let them go. When people are close to your heart, it is difficult for me to do that–let them go. I want to take today’s time and spend it seeing if I can assist in anyway with any of them. Yet, my personal path takes me another direction. Another opportunity for me to let this go and let God be God.
The recent struggle I’ve had with Jesus and my trust and belief of His love for me is now gone. I know He loves me just as I know my mom loved me. In mom’s case, her love was given in ways I couldn’t grasp when I was a boy in torment. However, this is not the case with Jesus. He is showing me that He is not crippled in showing love as my mother was. He is showing me how to recognize the multitude of ways His Love is being shown and was being shown even during the years of abuse. I pray today that those I love who are hurting can feel the Love of Christ and recognize it in these tormenting times upon them.