As I got home yesterday from the last of the three programs, I found myself emotionally spent. I ate a bite, did a couple of chores and sat down to read the paper. In so doing I found myself battling some of the most ridiculous temptations. I was able to take about a 15 minute nap, but then it all started again. We had a Christmas party with the leadership of Celebrate Recovery to attend so I got things ready for it but couldn’t dispel these feelings. Even this morning as I prepare to head to a school district, I don’t feel all together. I realize that last week takes its toll on a person, but, this I didn’t expect. Satan wants us believing that being a new creation is only a myth. He is not going to quit trying to bring one back into the old destructive, beliefs. Yesterday was a reality of this.
In the midst of the afternoon I had a text message from one of the people in our CR leadership. They were asking me what do I do when I know God’s truth but my heart and my head are disconnected from it? I found myself thinking this is exactly where I am presently. It actually helped awaken me to let go of trying and give it to God. Remembering to use the temptation to pray for someone with a similar temptation. I wrote about this not so long ago. The reality that God is always stronger and always present is becoming much more real. Praise God!