I’ve begun a bible study with someone on Thursday mornings so we met for the second time yesterday going through the introduction of the book we decided on along with its first chapter. The author’s purpose in the book is to teach us to believe in the authority of Jesus Christ and the power behind this authority. The author weaves his own struggle to believe into his writing and how God over time taught him to not just read His Word–but to believe it and put it into the practice of everyday living.
As we began yesterday the person I’m meeting with stated he’s nervous about getting excited because of what God might want him to do with his story. His confession brought back many, many pleas I’ve had throughout much of my own life. I was able to tell him that I spent 5 years in Celebrate Recovery before I finally opened up to the truth of my entire story. It was one thing to admit I’d been sexually abused by a gay brother for 12+ years. It was another thing to finally admit that this abuse had led to my own gay thoughts and desires. Confessing our entire story is never easy. I was also able to tell him that no matter what our story contains, God not only will prepare us for our “telling moment”, but He also prepares anyone who is to hear it. Never in my giving of my story have I found judgement in its telling. Instead, it has brought me so much closer to so many people who finally feel they can admit something they’ve been holding within waiting for a safe moment to do their own confessing.
God is such an Amazing God. For so long I feared His punishment and the exposure to shame. Instead, I’ve only found love, support, GRACE and FREEDOM. These gifts He gives us are for each of us as we step into our commitment with God.