The journey of today has started with an unexpected surprise. I was journaling as I do to start my devotional time telling Jesus how human I am and how sorry I am for it. I was quickly reminded that my humanness is mine, not my brothers and not my dads. It is also not measured for value by either of them. My value doesn’t come from my humanness anyway. My value is already within me because of the very one who created me before dad or Rick were even thought about. At the end of the journaling I asked my daily question of Jesus wanting to know what He wanted me to know for today? This was my surprise–I instantly heard in my mind the message that today it will be God talking to me. He wanted me to know that this humanness thing I’ve struggled with all my life is just that–a struggle. Also, He was reminding me that it is no longer my identity and in fact, it is a lie. The voices I hear in my head are no longer that of dad, they are of evil–Satan. He is the father of lies. I also know that I am not to believe any of them.
When things go wrong like this silly laptop issue I beat myself up inside thinking I’m being punished for my past and even present. I allow lies to be momentary truths. I was so amazed to hear God telling me just what His Word says. As I write this I know that a reader may question me about actually hearing the voice of God. Yet, I know this is true for it happened also in my therapy when I had thought I just didn’t have value enough for God to send an angel to help me out. (I tell this full story in my book). Instead, God showed up Himself with Jesus and lifted my shame locking it away so it no longer owned me.
This morning God reminded me that He alone is my God, my DAD, and He loves me dearly. My humanness is temporary and is not my identity. He is my true identity!