My eyes were opened again this morning to another truth God is bringing out in the book of Romans. in the second chapter Paul is saying that we are judged according to the way we have judged others. This really hit home for me because those of us who have carried abuse in our background feel as though we have a “right to judge”. In fact, in the ministry of Celebrate Recovery one hears every so often something like, “Well, no wonder you feel the way you do.” Those words and others like them give a victim the mentality that I have permission to judge.

It has taken me most of my life to step out of judging dad. To stop judging him and to ask for forgiveness for this action of mine took many big steps. In my mind he deserved to be judged. But, Romans reminds me that God will take care of that–I don’t have to and I’m not suppose to. In fact, I will be judged the same way I want him judged. That is sobering!

Now that I am finally at this stage of forgiveness with dad I can and do see him as a victim of humanness and sin. God reminds me to look first to Him and then as I look at dad I do so through God’s lens rather than my own. Forgiveness is a huge step and for me it has taken most of my life. Yet, the result of forgiveness is a genuine freedom not found until it is completed. It is well worth the change of heart. I love God’s faithfulness to us. He truly is Faithful to the end.