“The Joy of the Lord is my Strength”. These are the words of a chorus I use to sing when I was much younger. This topic of Joy is one that Jesus is wanting me to stay with for a while longer. Let me give some background. Recently I was asking the two seasoned counselors how they would address the topic of homosexuality with a client? I also added the topic of pornography because both of these are items which clients are “putting on the table”. I was told to think about sexuality first as the topic to address. God gave all of us sexuality and it is a gift from God to be used for creation and pleasure. He gives us guidelines in His Word regarding it.

This morning as I was journaling and asking Jesus what He wanted me to know for today, He asked if I found JOY in sexuality? As I began to actually personalize this question I found myself realizing I’d never found JOY in my sexuality. It has been a torment all of my life. Yes, I find pleasurable moments, but JOY? This topic has been a root of major torment all of my life. As I admitted this to Jesus, He asked me to seek JOY in my sexuality. Instead of resenting it, try seeing it as the gift it is. He then stated that Satan works overtime to keep sexuality in the flesh and feelings category. Here is where man lives most of the time. I can live with gratitude knowing that the pleasure side of sexuality is mine along with the creation side as I look at my family. There is nothing but JOY here. The strength in JOY is found when I realize this gift of God. Satan tempts us in ways of the flesh, but who wants to diminish this JOY by momentary pleasure that then leads to guilt/shame? This gives me an entirely new meaning to THE JOY OF THE LORD IS MY STRENGTH!

Jesus is never done teaching me and helping me deal with my hang-ups (as Celebrate Recovery labels them). I love Him for this and I can use it to counsel ones in bondage!

The past two Sunday sermons have been addressing the JOY of the Lord. I think we all know there is a huge difference between joy and happiness with happiness being a temporary response to something and joy being a state of being. I’ve known this but I haven’t given too much thought to it until yesterday. All too often I will let present circumstances circumvent my state of being–JOY. I don’t take the circumstances to the depth for which JOY is found. I’ll let my emotions have their way with me. I won’t necessarily show them or express them to anyone, but I’ll definitely have them.

In my devotional today, the prayer at the closing reads in part: “…Just as You are three-in-one, I find all the parts of myself completely whole in you….” I have always wished for that to be true. If every part of me were whole I would have JOY. Reading this today led me to yesterday’s sermon and the critical importance of taking JOY to the depth of my belief system. Is my faith that confident? Well, it is for this moment and I’m going to work on keeping it there. I want to remind my emotions that my confidence is not found in them. My confidence is in the Righteous of Jesus Christ and what He has done for me and each one of us!

I was recently given an acrostic for FEAR. It is: F=False, E=Evidence, A=Appearing, R=Real; False evidence appearing real. As I heard this I couldn’t help but realize how relevant this is for so many of us who participate in Celebrate Recovery. Along with this, it is simply relevant for all of us. No wonder God tells us to fear Him. He is the One who takes care of our needs and guides our living if we obey His nudges each and every day.

There are so many verses throughout the Bible telling us to fear God. Psalm 31:19 says, “How great is your goodness, which you have stored up for those who fear You, which You have wrought for those who take refuge in You….” There is no false evidence when we fear God, but living life as long as I have, I have only found my own fears of my past to be bondage for me (false evidence) where fearing God and obeying Him has been the most freeing thing I’ve ever done and will continue to do.

Two weeks ago I was approached by an individual who wanted counseling ASAP. I set the first appointment but before it took place they needed to meet NOW. I arranged the meeting for this person and their spouse. The one felt communication had stopped and they needed help with this area immediately. I gave them an assignment and we met again late yesterday afternoon. I had a marriage assessment which I had them do at the beginning of yesterday’s session. It included questions in several critical areas for a marriage’s success–one being communication.

When both had finished rating each question in all the categories I recorded results only to find that communication was their strongest area. The area of weakness was in the realm of spiritual growth. Communication was scored high because the one had found the spouse’s communication to be trustworthy.

When God is left out of the equation, all the other areas of our lives dwindle in their strength. On the flip side, when God is the critical part of one’s marriage, all of the other areas can more easily be addressed. It was amazing to watch how this couple quickly set new goals for the way they spent time together. WOW, God is so good!

Last night was our Celebrate Recovery. The lesson was MORAL. Fifteen years ago I had one simple definition for this word moral: don’t have sex outside of marriage. I don’t have any idea where that came from, but it was big in my mind. The true definition for moral is more about being honest/earnest. The one big moment for me was the lesson’s attachment to the Serenity Prayer. (It wasn’t spoken by the one teaching the lesson last night, but it became clear in my mind.) It says in the first stanza of the prayer: “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference….”

Anyone who comes to CR and stays will eventually need to address all of the hurts, hang-ups and habits in their daily living. One also grows out of the mindset that I’m a victim (if they come with a background of abuse) and understand they must accept their response to the abuse as their responsibility. This is where “the courage to change the things I can” comes into play. I see this often in the counseling sessions and I find it in myself.

God doesn’t want me (or anyone for that matter) getting comfortable with one’s hurts, hang-ups or habits. Making excuses for them makes us a victim of the driver for it, when God wants us to trust Him to give us the courage to change the things I can by His Almighty Power. I’m still learning how patient and thorough our God is if we only give Him the chance. Taking courageous steps into these parts of our lives is huge, but the payoff is truly FREEDOM!

Today’s post is a little late getting done. I needed to take my oldest daughter to the airport this morning so I’m behind my normal routine. She had told me she wanted to talk on the way to the airport. She was only 4 when her mom divorced me and moved to Washington. In spite of her young age, it had an impact on her which is still troubling her to this day. She is seeing a counselor who is giving her some very important guidance in working through her present struggles. I was very touched to hear her talk about all of it. God is always working and I love hearing how amazing He is in bringing insights which lead to healing.

Having Jesus Christ as our personal Savior is such a tremendous GIFT. Serving Him and watching Him and The Holy Spirit bring LIGHT into darkness is another GIFT unto itself. How fortunate we are!

The goal for me this year is to keep my eyes on Jesus throughout each day no matter what the circumstances are which occur in the day. At this point in time, if I didn’t have it written on the top of my prayer list, I’d completely lose sight of it. I had no idea how much my eyes are on the circumstances of the day only. As I journal each morning I am able to recall the circumstances of the day before and talk to God about it. God, instead, is helping me see how I wrap myself into the issues of the day without seeking where God is in it. In counseling moments I have nudges which I act upon and know they come from God. Outside of these sessions I am needing to hear God at the moment rather than the day after.

Man says we are to listen for understanding. This is a common standard for meetings in today’s world. Ask clarifying questions follows in line with the listening for understanding. I find myself listening but I am a novice at having my spirit hear God’s Spirit while I am listening to man. It is the next day in my journaling that I presently hear God’s Spirit respond to the day before. God is wanting me to grow in my hearing Him during the day. This seems to be my assignment for the present in learning to keep my eyes on Jesus within the day.

It is always good when we can bring Jesus into the events of a day. What I am becoming very aware of is the need to do this at the time rather than the reflection time the following morning. Listening to man keeping my emotions in check while I listen to God in my spirit is this assignment. I’ve always said I’m not good at doing two things at the same time, but I think this is different. I’m asking God to help me along this path of learning.

Yesterday was one of those unusual days where everything I wanted to get done got done and then much more was also accomplished. All I could do was say, Thank You God.

The most touching part of the day came about after I’d talked with my niece about her mom’s service which will be next month. Her mom is my sis who passed shortly after thanksgiving. I will be conducting the service so she and I were talking about what she’d like to include. A request which caught me off guard was for me to sing a song which I would want to sing for my sis. I’ve never needed to do something like this so I said I’d have to give this some thought and pray about it. Well, in the afternoon I googled “songs for sisters”. Eventually I found a song by Steve & Annie Chapman entitled: Brother and Sister song. It was exactly what I’d want to sing for my sis. The added beauty is that my wife Kathy will sing the portion of the song that is for the sister to sing. We will sing the song as a duet.

I’m continually amazed at the intimate, detailed interest God has in our lives. He cares so much more than we realize if we only give Him the chance to show it. How precious our Heavenly Father is!

Proverbs 12:28 says in part, “Abundant life is discovered by walking in righteousness….” I had to stop and reread this a couple of times and then highlight it in my Bible. Abundant is the first of the words which stood out to me. As I’ve gotten to the age I am now I’ve adjusted what abundant means to me. As a young husband it was all about having enough income to support my wife and start a family. Teaching is not an occupation considered to be abundant in income. As I’ve entered into the “retirement years” abundant has changed a good deal. The income side is there, but “meaningful” and “purposeful” are now drivers. I wanted these to be my drivers when I was young, but having a sufficient income always interfered it seems.

The latter part of verse says that abundant life is discovered by walking in righteousness. As a young man I focused on abundant life through income and hoping I was teaching as God would want and doing what I should at church for Him. I recognize so much more clearly that righteousness is found by surrender of self and walking in faith. Income will be there, meaningfulness and purposefulness will be completed if I am surrendered to God and following His Spirit’s nudges throughout each and every day.

Is Christ seen through me? That’s my question and obedience is the response I want to give Him.

Yesterday morning held a counseling moment I was needing to surrender over and over. It was a situation where we were dealing with a victim and the abuser in the same room. My flesh kept wanting to worry about this session, yet my spirit knew it was the right thing to do. I had my prayer warrior praying knowing this and the time of the session. As I got to our room I prayed over it asking God’s Holy Spirit to not only be present, but inviting Him to take control.

As the hour ended the young man thanked his dad for coming. We prayed and I too thanked the dad for coming and for his honest listening and responding for clarity. I then invited him to give his son and me some time for us. He then left. The son was pleased with the outcome of the meeting, but somewhat numb about believing it to be as true as it sounded. God’s Light had shone brilliantly in the session and man had responded to it. When the son left his smile was bigger than I’d ever seen.

It is amazing to see and experience God Working. What a privilege I have!