As I write the title of this blog today I instantly am reminded that this journey isn’t going to end until human life ends. The struggles of the flesh are Satan’s playground (battlefield actually). As I write battlefield I also am reminded that I am not to join in the battle, for if I do I will lose. Christ has already won this battle for me, This reminder I need to keep in bold print before me each and every day.

Tonight I will be co-leading a new step study for men. God has been nudging for this to take place. I will be leading with a new co-leader. He is excited to be a leader which excites me. I know of a couple men who will be coming and I pray for those who God is nudging to come. What a wonderful God we serve. The bondage of secrecy is about to be shattered for some men who are willing to take the risk of starting a journey they have feared. There is a brilliant Light about to penetrate a darkness only God’s Brilliance can illuminate. I look forward to being part of this opportunity.

It doesn’t take long for the rug to be pulled out from under you–or at least the attempts to do so. God has abundantly been giving His Grace these past several days. Yesterday was a beautiful day with a church service and sermon which blessed everyone abundantly. As I went through the rest of the day I began to hear old messages over and over taunting me. Along with this I couldn’t dispel my grief for my two sisters who are struggling with their declining health. I knew I’d be returning to schools today and I just wasn’t ready to do this.

Early this morning I could no longer sleep so I got up to begin my devotions. There is nothing like time with God to re-anchor oneself. I’ve always been one to take problems around me and work to bring healthy solutions for them. This past week, seeing my sisters as they are, I’ve wanted to rescue them. This morning God has reminded me that He is their One True God, Father, Loving and Caring Friend. His Grace is sufficient for them just as it is for me. The gloom of yesterday began to lift as I gave all of this “desire to rescue” to God–He is the only One with a real plan.

God has work for me to do which doesn’t include stewing about what He is doing. Instead, God wants me trusting and believing. So, I may be sad about life at this moment, but knowing Who is really in charge makes me confident they will be OK in the end. How I love this God we serve!

The trip home was smooth and without any bumps other than a few from wind currents as we flew from Oakland to Boise. I talked with my sis last night and she said she’d cried most of the day. This breaks my heart. It only reinforces how lonely she is. Our week was like an oasis. How I pray God will provide new insights for her as His Holy Spirit surrounds her.

Early yesterday morning when I arose I had begun my devotions. When I came to the bible reading I found the chapter to be rather long and my time was running short needing to finish getting ready to head to the airport. It was odd, but God seemed to say–leave it until tomorrow. I did that and now that tomorrow has come I know why. It was chapter 13 in Matthew. In this chapter Jesus tells several parables which I’ve read many, many times; but never in the Passion Bible. There are a couple of the parables which talk about “precious jewels” or “filled with treasure”. I’ve always interpreted them to mean Jesus as the treasure. However, in this translation, I am the jewel/treasure Jesus found. It says that Jesus sold all He had in heaven to come and bring the “Good News” to you and me. We are the treasure He found. My cousin who heads the recovery program where I told my story last Friday night, said many complimentary things and added that I needed to believe them as true. I kept telling myself to let these compliments be received as such and to not deflect them as I’ve always done. Then this morning I read that I’m a treasure Jesus found. Good grief, what more does a man need to know than this?!

I’ve lived a long time wishing to be be accepted by my dad and finally simply giving up on it and trying to let it all go. This morning a much greater reality has come–My Heavenly Father calls me a treasure and I’m not going to deflect it–I’m receiving it! I’m praying any reader who struggles like I have will see this true also for you.

Yesterday was a priceless gift. Going to see Alice and sitting with her holding her hand was priceless. She is so frail. Yet, she was alert and able to comprehend our conversation and even respond just a little. Her daughter had arranged for us to come and sit with her on a patio so we didn’t have to enter the facility. They gave us masks to wear but once we were together we didn’t have to wear them as we spoke with Alice. My heart was happy, yet I couldn’t help but cry as we departed seeing my sis like this. She is ready to go “home” just as soon as God is ready to receive her into His eternal Kingdom.

Last night I told my story for the recovery group. Yes, I was a bit nervous as I always am. Yet, it is always a blessing to not only tell my story, but to receive the thanks which follow. Several identified with parts of it and some–all of it. I’m always amazed to feel so weak, yet to hear the words like courageous and kind. It is simply amazing how God takes our mess and turns it into a message as I’ve witnessed so many, many times in the past 14 years. It is a genuine blessing to take part in God’s Kingdom work and see seeds planted in others as God is working in their own lives.

Our God is AMAZING and so GOOD!

In a couple of hours we will be in the air flying home. Thank you Jesus for this opportunity to return to California and see my family here one more time.

Today we complete the second reason for coming to California. We finally get to see my oldest living sis. She has been in an assisted living place for a few years now but has been isolated from anyone due to COVID in the facility. Today has been enough days so we can be with her in their courtyard. There isn’t a lot of personality left in her body, but it will be so nice to simply be with her for a short while. She is ready to be with Jesus in heaven, but that time isn’t yet.

Tonight I will give my testimony to my cousin’s recovery group. I did this 4 years ago when we were here. It will be nice to be with them again tonight. When we were here before I was able to talk to my Aunt Billie who cleared many misunderstandings I had about my uncle, dad’s youngest brother. I had thought he was much like dad, but in reality, he had felt paralyzed not knowing what to do with dad and his behaviors. It gave me another step of freedom. I want this group to know this too for they love my cousin who does counseling for their church as well as leads their recovery program.

Tomorrow we will fly home. I am so grateful we have been able to come. God is so GOOD!

The journey today started with my sis waking up much earlier so I haven’t gotten to my blog until now. This is the day where we have a prayer request hoping to have God work in a situation here that has been very troubling. It would be appreciated if any reader prayed for God’s intervention when this group is together at noontime today. Thank you!

It is so obvious that God is working here. I’ve written about the evidence of this for a couple of days. It is also obvious just how fragile our human life is. Our human flesh is weak and we want to be invincible so we make prideful decisions that can make it appear that God isn’t working at all. I see this happening here too. I do it daily myself as I suppose all of mankind does to one degree or another.

Tomorrow we will encounter a situation that is one of the ugliest for us to do while here. I have hoped that we could step into the details of what makes it ugly, yet at the same time, it could worsen. I have no idea if God will open a door for it, yet I know if He does, He will also provide the words and atmosphere for it to show Him rather than just be man’s words.

God is so AMAZING and I love Him with all my heart. May His Will be done and may He be GLORIFIED!

It has been nothing but one blessing after another being here with my sis and seeing just how much God has done to help her overcome. My cousin who lives only a few miles away is going to start picking her up each Sunday morning to take her to church with them. Bonnie is so happy and they are too! How I love this.