Yesterday was a good but troubling day. Church was great as usual. I came home after first service and quickly ate. Another man from our Celebrate Recovery was coming after 2nd service to share his inventory with me. This is a tough step and I knew we’d need time and I wanted to be ready. It is always amazing to see just what God has done in a person’s life and is continuing to do. This man’s story proved this once again. He will be co-leading a new step study starting in a few weeks. He has done a couple step studies already but had not completed sharing his inventory until now. It is so good to see and know how faithful our God is.

As he was leaving my oldest grandson drove in. I’d invited him to come for supper and he came a couple hours early which was nice so we could have time to visit. He is doing well after having had knee surgery a couple weeks ago. The physical therapist says he’s healing well ahead of schedule. Even though our time was great, my spirit has been troubled since. I know this has to do with unfinished business. I’ve always been one to have things in life squared away by the time you leave a situation. However, I certainly know this can’t be the case when there are other people involved. You can only take care of your part. I realize God is teaching me to live by His Spirit within me and not my own. His Spirit is patient and kind as the fruit of the Spirit are outlined. I need to surrender my spirit and will to Him in all things.

God is always working I know. Intentionally living as a new creation for God is requiring me to identify God’s Spirit within me and my own will. Separating this out is like a whole new assignment in living. I can’t be good at something until I face it and this I’m starting to do. God is faithful and true just as His Word says. I’m very grateful for this.

If you really want to see the ugliness of flesh, start working on your spiritual side. For months I’ve wanted to be more awake to the spiritual being God created in me. I know God is Spirit and He gives me The Holy Spirit to live within me. Being awake and fully awake to this truth is what I’ve desired. Our flesh, selfish being, is so dominant it is hard to separate this out. This book I’m reading: The Spiritual Man is like a paradox. Man is flesh while God is Spirit. Sin awoke flesh and it remains awake until death to flesh. What is being brought to the forefront of my awakening is this intense battle between flesh (will) and spirit–The being of God. Our flesh doesn’t want to be in second place to spirit so the battle is always present within. This is what I am awakening to as I consciously focus on growing my intent on being a spiritually focused person.

Being a new creation is all about living spiritually focused. I know I want this to be the driver in me. There is a song I heard Friday night on The Gaither Gospel Hour. It is sung by 7 men and is entitled, I Then Shall Live. The tune is from the old hymn, Be Still My Soul. The words are written by Gloria Gaither. My spirit cries out as I listen to it. I’d like our quartet to sing it but I think I’d just blubber through it each time. You can hear it on YouTube.

God is so, so Good. How I want to serve Him well.

GOD IS LOVE! What is love? What/Who is God? LOVE & GOD are ONE. I’m reading I John right now. The book of John is known to be the book which describes Jesus as Love. Well, the three small books of John also dwell much on the topic of LOVE. In my person I’ve always thought of love more as doing loving things. However, in John he tells: GOD IS LOVE. The very character of God is what Love is. Yes, God does loving things, but whatever God does is love. The discipline of God is love just as the kindness of God is love.

This really hits home for me because in man’s interpretation, if one does something which seems confrontational, it isn’t considered love. It might be delivered in love, but the receiver didn’t like it. However, if truth is behind it and it awakens one to a Godliness absent before it and God has nudged you to confront, then we wait to let God do His loving part. We are simply to do our part.

I have so much I need to learn about the balance of love as God is Love. Since God is Love, every aspect of our behaviors should demonstrate this love. In so doing, one either knows the love right off the bat, or it brings one to a better balance of thinking–eventually. This might not make any sense to you the reader, but it is big on my mind right now as I learn what being a new creation is all about. God is talking a lot in the books John wrote about His Love. I want to live this out as God’s new creation.

God has been abundantly working of late. It seems wrong to write this because I know God is always at work. A better way of putting this is that I’m much more awake to God’s working in some specific areas. As I last wrote, our group finished the Mending the Soul class and will meet one more time to do a reflection survey and read the letters we wrote last Fall when we started the journey of the class.

Last night was chip night for our Celebrate Recovery group. We do this the first Thursday night of each month. We end each one with the opportunity for people to take a first day chip if they are launching a new recovery step. For months I’ve been wanting to go forward and take a “day one” chip for “living as a new creation”. I’ve not done it because I just couldn’t develop in my mind what the tangible pieces of this would look like. Yes, there would be things like no fleeing to porn when tempted (the addictions of life), but I knew that wasn’t the root for me. In completing Mending the Soul, it all came together. The tangible items are more about replacing the lies about who I am and who dad was, mom was, my brother was. Each one of them were humans who struggled with their own lives. I was a product of mom and dad, and a brother to the one. Their struggles for me were in the realms of abuse. My struggle was what I’d grown to believe about myself due to the abuse. Today, I am equipped to deal with these struggles and call them as such. They are no longer my identity. So, these tangible items are: 1. I am a man created in God’s image; 2. I am the home for The Holy Spirit and Jesus Christ is on the throne of my life; 3. I am on purpose (not a mistake); 4. Each day I’m on assignment for God the Father and His Kingdom work. There are more but these are a healthy start for the list.

These are all beliefs which have been huge character defects in my thinking and believing. So, last night I took a chip for living each day believing and knowing these are no longer a hope, but living truths for me. Praise God!

PS–I had a doctor’s appt. yesterday early in Boise so I missed getting this written.

It is no surprise that this morning’s devotion was centered around God’s timing–his “due season” as scripture often defines it. In Galatians 6:9 it tells us to not get weary in waiting, for in due season we shall reap if we faint not. My role is to pray and to trust. This is what I will do and then take action if God provides Light on a place where I sense His Spirit’s nudge.

Last night the group I’m leading, Mending the Soul, finished chapter 10. This is a celebration! We will meet one last time next week to do a reflection piece and then read the letters we wrote to ourselves last fall when we were starting. These letters were written by each of us to ourselves telling what we hoped we glean, learn, discover, as we walked through the class. It will be most interesting to reread this and see just what God has done. I do know that for myself at this point I’m far more able to see myself as “the new creation” God promised when we accepted His Son Jesus into our lives. This concept was just too much until I had to face some things the class brought out I had still been in denial to. I’ve always wanted whatever I did to annihilate the past from me and give me an entirely different mind picture of who I am, etc. God, on the other hand, has wanted me to see my past in the mind picture I have but without the grips of shame. This is a huge miracle for me from the class for now this is true.

Today I see God so much differently than I ever have before. He truly is the loving God I could see Him being for others. However, now I know Him as this loving God for me too. How grateful I am for Him, His Son Jesus and the tremendous Gift–The Holy Spirit!

I don’t have to step very far into a day to see my “worry” being triggered. Today is no exception. I kept awakening in the night with problems of others on my mind an in my emotions. I use that time to pray (sometimes plead) but I never find peace until I am able to turn the worry into a package of trust I give to God. In so doing I also thank Him for the steps He is taking I cannot see. I can sure see why Christ tells us not to worry–it is all consuming and does ugly things to thinking and impacts my actions. Christ tells us it is a sin and I can easily see why.

Tonight we are having a monthly meeting for those who attended the LGBTQ 5-week class to address what the Bible says regarding this and how God would want His children to come along side this choice of living. Following the 5 week class the leader said she’d offer a monthly time for those interested to come together. It is the first Tuesday of each month. I had a grandmother call me last night. She and her daughter in law are coming for the first time. Their story is not so unlike many others and the helplessness is also very similar to others. I pray they will find the Light of Jesus as they come.

God is a wonderful God and the Only True God. Each morning as I get myself grounded with Him I feel ready for the day. Today I feel as though I may need additional grounding throughout the day. This is where Christ (The Holy Spirit) reminds me to TRUST HIM. I don’t want to step back into worry. So onward we go!

Yes, it is April Fools Day! However, the only real fool is the one who doesn’t recognize just how much Satan is trying to destroy our ability to see God the Father as the Loving Dad He is. This book, The Spiritual Man, is an amazing one allowing me to see just how much Satan wants to destroy my ability to know God and commune with Him, all the while, trusting Him and believing all the promises He tells me in His Word. I feel as though I am awakening to a world of promise which only God offers through turning our lives over to Him by accepting His Son Jesus as our Savior. I’ve had so many flaws in my beliefs and thinking which God’s Holy Spirit is now helping me see much more plainly.

The plight of man is not a pleasant one here on this earth when we leave God out of the equation. Man wants to conquer the evils of our times by our own ingenuity and strength, yet God tells us to surrender to Him and then to Trust Him. I know I’m preaching a little here, but these are truths I am now seeing and I have been one of the worst at trying to earn God’s favor in my own strength comparing it to man (dad) rather than believing what God tells me in His Word.

Trust has a new meaning for me today. I’m seeing it as the complete opposite of worry. As I see the plight of man (specifically the problems of my family, friends, loved ones) I will choose to trust rather than worry for each of them. I know God is the answer and I will obey God’s command to Trust Him (even praise Him for what He is doing and I can’t see) and then to obey Him by praying for these needs rather than worrying about them and trying to fix when I see a chance to do so, only causing further problems.

OK, my sermon is done and I’m ready for the day!