Yesterday’s class, Mending the Soul, brought about some remarkable awakening for the class members. We stepped into the chapter which addresses the darkness of the room we built for ourselves protecting us from what we feared. Little did we know at the time we were walling ourselves off from the sensitive love and grace God has for us. The chapter takes one through the process of recognizing these walls and the worthwhileness of taking a step outside of these walls to “trust” (even for a moment) God’s nudge through His Holy Spirit. Some didn’t think they were ready to take this step until it was pointed out that they had already taken it by attending this class. There are now 6 additional people who know each one’s story. All of this was done outside of the walls of protection each one of us had built. One of the class members said that he could now see a glimmer of God’s Light into his own darkness resulting from this class. He has a horrific story so this is truly a wonderful testimony of God’s penetrating Light into darkness for which Satan wants us to live.

The book of ACTS addresses the fullness of God’s Holy Spirit coming upon us. Little did I ever believe I could be the home of such a Pure and Holy Being, yet, here I sit, writing about this truth. Behind the wall I had built I was hanging onto my past for dear life knowing life would be destroyed it I revealed my past. Now, all these years later, I know that this past is being used by God’s Holy Spirit to help others find this same Light for their own healing. It is truly amazing what God does with such ugliness. How I love Him for this!

Yesterday I finished the gospels so today I began reading the book of Acts. I love the discoveries I continue to find at this age in my life. I often wish I could have been this awake at a much younger age! The title of the book, Acts, tells us it is time to take Action. However, the command of Jesus was to wait in prayer until The Holy Spirit has come upon you. I remember all too well saying I can move forward with “this” because I know what to do. I just need to wait on this one because I don’t know what to do. I was missing a major ingredient and that was the timing of God. When The Holy Spirit opens the door for action, I have found that I know this within from His nudge. It is different than my adrenalin telling me to take care of this. God wants His Son Jesus to lead in every aspect of our lives through His Gift of The Holy Spirit. I am never to separate out where I need The Holy Spirit. If I am living fully for God I need Him in every aspect of my life and from Him I need to respond by waiting or taking action.

The disciples had Jesus with them for 3 years. Then, they were without Him and told to wait until this anointing of The Holy Spirit. Learning to live from The Spirit’s leadership in our lives is very different from responding to an external motivation. Our own selfish nature is what we know first and foremost. Learning to discipline ourselves to hold in check our own desires until we know the nudge of The Holy Spirit is a genuine step of spiritual maturity. For me it is not a one time lesson. But, God is patient!

The desire of my heart is to not only know The Holy Spirit but to also trust Him completely in every aspect of my living. He is the very essence of Jesus living with the disciples for the 3 years. Yet, we get Him within us always. Today I give to Him every room in my life so I can serve God hitting on all cylinders.

It is good to be home. The trip to Montana is like a time warp as I think about it now. Anytime I go like this and work morning, noon, night and then immediately return, I feel this way. However, no matter what the feeling is, I rejoice in the Light God shed. Each site has a plan for moving forward along with a plan to clean out what is needed. I love the fact that the majority of them are believers so God’s Name can be used with agreement.

Yesterday I journaled something that I don’t want to reveal because it doesn’t need to be known by some readers. However, it was a tender message from my heart to Him and I just wasn’t sure what He would do with it. As I was driving home last night from the airport my wife was telling me some things which had taken place in my absence. One of those messages was my journaling request to God. As I write this now I just well up inside. God is such a tender-loving God. He cares so deeply about the souls of man. No matter the issues at hand, God wants to help us work through them so we can know Him as our Intimate God who cares deeply about His creation–us! How I Praise Him for this tender, caring nature.

As I went into yesterday I had no idea that “the garden” I wrote about was the right descriptor. The school (being compared to a garden) had been tilled, the right seeds were present and all of the fertilizer was ready to be applied. However, what had not been addressed is the “thistle patch”. If you know thistles you know that you can dig them out and even spray them, but their roots go so deep they will reappear and choke out any crop. They also have these thorny leaves making them difficult for anyone to address. The thistle patch was identified yesterday and a plan of action was prepared. The evidence of the patch and the roots of it were made known. All of the other work of the day was set aside in order to complete this. All of us were emotionally spent by last night, but it was a “spent” well worth taking place.

God is interested in every detail of our living. This truth about this is very evident. Today as I go to the other school I pray for the same to happen. The site has very different needs, but hindrances need to be identified so they do not block the first and only purpose of schools–to educate well all students within them.

I will be heading home tonight. When I was questioning myself the first part of this week about being here, I was reminded by God to look up to Him and release my fear knowing fear is a temptation and it is a sin if I respond to it rather than to what God has asked me to do. Now that I’m here and walking the path God intended I know why Satan wanted me to act on the fear. I also thank God that He is the Gardener Who knows just how to handle Satan’s thistle patches. I love gardening with this Master Gardener!

Today is one of my grandson’s 18th birthday. I hate being away for this great occasion, but we will all celebrate it together on Sunday. He is a great young man and I am honored to call him my grandson. Happy Birthday Hayden!

Tonight is our kickoff for Celebrate Recovery. It is the start of our 14th year. This is the first kickoff I will have missed. I got a message from my granddaughter who is working the youth program for Celebrate Recovery this year. She and her boyfriend will do this together. Her message is that he is sick and doesn’t want to expose it to anyone. I should be prepared for these attacks knowing Satan hates this ministry. So this morning I put it in God’s Hands. Only He is able to address this evil with His Purity and Light. Tonight will be a time of God being blessed and honored. Satan never wins when he has to face God’s Love and Light.

Today I will walk into the schools which God has given to me to give assistance here in Montana. I was informed last night about the needs for which some are deeply rooted. However, there is no gardener like God for uprooting weeds. I look forward to be a gardening assistant today. There is nothing any prettier than a well-groomed, productive garden. That is what God intended for each of our schools to be!

Today as I awoke I did so with gloom and dread at my door. I’m leaving today to work with the district in Montana and I am going alone–driving 3 hours on my own with google maps and working with a new group of people addressing with them what needs to be improved. Along with that, I’m leaving here at home some issues I wish were in a healthier place. So, as I began my journaling I told God I was battling all of this and I was then reminded to surrender it. As I started my devotional reading it was all about fear being a sin and it needs to be replaced with faith. Lastly, as I began my scripture reading in John 14, Jesus is telling the disciples how important it is to have faith in what He is teaching them. There would be a good deal of trouble awaiting them, but to never fear it, face it with FAITH!

All of a sudden my fears were replaced with anticipation. I could see this person walking into this new district accompanied with a Savior, a Lord and Master who is Faithful to the end. He is the Light needed to know how to move forward with the work at hand. I also saw that as I leave this morning I am doing so with the Hands of Jesus already surrounding the ones I love taking care of every detail. At this point I saw the fear I’ve known all of my life as an ugly sin. I recognized it, rejected it and God has replaced it with a deep appreciation and love for Him and a confidence that I can go where He leads me confident I am not abandoning home for He is already my home’s Protector and Savior.

Wow, all of this is a new reality for which I am most grateful! God has moved this reality from my head to my heart. God is LOVE! He wants so much for us to recognize this and today I am awake to it far more than I have ever been. To GOD be all Glory!

My devotional, Bible reading today was John 13. In this chapter Jesus prepares to wash the disciples feet. As He was preparing to do this He was also telling the disciples why He was going to do this. Then, He added they should do this for one another.

I’ve always read this in past as a genuine showing of love from Jesus to His disciples. Today, when I read this I had this picture flash through my mind of Christ preparing to wash my own feet. I quickly got rid of the picture but I kept sensing The Holy Spirit’s nudge to return to it. I finally stopped reading and asked Christ to show me what I needed to face. The filth of my past journey has my feet too dirty. Let me do the washing, I told Him. But, He simply said He was taking care of that filth. That is what love does–My Love. It was then that I relented to letting Christ wash my feet. What a humbling, yet loving experience this is.

I don’t know about you, but this awoke in me the beauty of God’s Love for each of us. There are so many things we are willing to do for someone else, but helping one with their ugly sinfulness is the purest form of love. This is just what Christ has done and He is asking us to do this for one another.

The book of John is called the Love Book. This is one of those tremendous examples of why it is called this.

Today is the birthday of my oldest living brother. He turns 85 today. His wife is very focused on their role of keeping our family united and connected. I love them for this. Happy birthday Herb!

The journey through the weekend has been tough. Strife is never easy to work through or to witness when ones are close to you. As I brought this to Jesus this morning in my journaling He immediately reminded me that it is these times He uses to His honor and glory. I just need to release all of it to His Work and not try to make it my own. My role is to first and foremost keep my eyes on Him. He is the Healer and Restorer to Health. I have witnessed this so many times, but today I needed the reminder again. I do love how faithful and true our Lord Jesus is!

The book of John is often called the book of Jesus’ Love. There is something about John and his makeup which allowed him to connect to the love of Jesus early on. His book highlights the Love of Jesus like no other does. He is the writer who uses the term–“Jesus wept” when Jesus was addressing Lazarus’ family when Jesus was about to restore him to life. It is such a tender moment when one sheds tears over one he loves. It brings out a connection between Jesus and man that is rarely seen. He loves His creation and sheds tears over our agony. He is our GREAT HEALER and RESTORER TO HEALTH! How I Praise Him!

Satan wants to steal, kill and destroy. As I read this in today’s scripture reading I had to take some time and reflect on this truth. It is one of the fundamental truths which man, being influenced by Satan’s schemes, doesn’t even want to admit exists at all. There are so many lies I held onto for so long in my life due to the fears planted in me from abuse. Today I recognize them and the source of them. I can now reject them and replace them with the truths of God’s Word. One of these truths is that Satan not only exists, but he solely exists to do all he can to destroy the beauty of walking with God and having Jesus as our Savior and Lord.

Today in the class Mending the Soul we step into the chapter on Powerlessness and Deadness. As men, the author says, we have to step out of denial so we can recognize the lies of Satan. He wants us to hide our past so he can keep us trapped in it. He is the author of powerlessness and deadness and our hiding. As we come together today I pray for The Holy Spirit’s presence and the Strength of Jesus Christ Himself to be so present that we not only face this ugliness, but continue to do so once we leave the room. It is easy, I know all too well, to face it in group and deny it as soon as I walk out of the room living each day in the denial of my past. I did this far too long. Today, I want to walk only in the Light of God’s Truth praying this Light will help others to do the same.

As I saw today’s date at the beginning of my devotion I instantly was reminded of this horrific day 20 years ago. Tragedy united our country for a time when this happened. I remember well the newspaper heading following this event. It said that the churches across our nation were filled with folks. It is good to remember that man is not made to understand all that transpires here on earth. We are limited in our understanding no matter how much we wish to be in control of “all things”.

As I read In John 8 today, Jesus is talking to the ones in the temple telling them about His direct connection to God. They question it, doubt it and eventually condemn Him for this. It sounds so much like us today. The tragedies of today are not bringing folks to look beyond themselves to see God. Jesus tells us these days are coming when man will no longer seek God, but will seek themselves. I pray we will awaken to the truth about ourselves–insufficient without God our Creator. In so doing we will turn to our Creator and seek Him fully.